Clouds
by TopOfChaplin
Summary: A young man comes along who's had a rough past. Thomas is given orders to keep an extra eye on him by the Lord himself. But Thomas is damaged too, and what no one knows is that what they need is not acceptable. Not in 1920, and Downton Abbey is no exception. But the sky is quickly changing and everyone will feel it as the clouds roll in. A dangerous change shadowing over the abbey.
1. Chapter 1 - Part 1

**Clouds**

~ A Downton Abbey series

_Author:_ TopOfChaplin

_Pairing:_ Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent

_Other characters: _Lord Grantham, Lady Grantham, Mary, Edith, Sybil, Tom Branson, Matthew Crawley, Mrs. Crawley, Lady Grantham, Mrs. Patmore, Ms. O'Brien, Mrs. Hughes, Mr. Carson, Daisy, Ivy, Alfred

_Genres:_ Angst, Romance, Drama

_Rating:_ M

_Summary:_ A young boy comes along who's had a rough past. Thomas is given orders to keep an extra eye on him by the Lord himself. But Thomas is damaged too, and what no one knows is that what they need is not acceptable. Not in 1920, and Downton Abbey is no exception. But the sky is quickly changing, and everyone will feel it as the clouds roll in. A dangerous change casting its shadows over the abbey.

_Acknowledgements:_ I do not own any of the characters, and all events are purely fictional. The story does not follow the series correctly at all times, and some circumstances are changed.

* * *

Cumulus - Part 1

_~ **Cumulus** clouds are puffy clouds that sometimes look like pieces of **floating cotton**. The base of each cloud is often flat and may be only 1000 m above the ground. The top of the cloud has rounded towers. When the top of the cumulus resembles the head of a cauliflower, it is called cumulus congestus or towering cumulus. These clouds grow upward, and they can develop into a giant cumulonimbus, which is a **thunderstorm cloud**. ~_

"Thomas, you'll be skipping dinner, his Lordship wants a word with you this instant," Mr. Carson barked as he entered the kitchen.

Everyone had been seated and Mrs Patmore has just served the stew, but all stood as the butler entered. Faces turned to Thomas, who was keeping his head bent. He let go of his napkin and left the kitchen, the others getting seated again, fussing at once over what could urge the Lordship as to not let it wait. It was unusual at Downton that the upstairs bothered the staff during their meals, after all they only had three a day, and worked hard. Only in situations of utter crisis would they summon the butler, or if needed, the valets.

"Now, now, you eat. I'll deal with this matter but be sure to leave some supper," Carson finished before he left the downstairs once again. Thomas took the stairs in a swift and met the Lord in the dining hall.

"Thomas, please follow me outside for a moment will you? No need to retrieve your coat or mine, it'll only be a second." Thomas gave Carson a glance, but if Carson knew something of the matter, he did not give it away. It was not cold, chilly maybe but not unpleasant. Almost too hot to be the start of November, but Thomas didn't have another moment to blunder over the weather, for just down the pat from the great entrance stood a shadow. It was too dark for Thomas to see much, but it certainly had to be a young man considering the hat he was wearing. There was a suitcase in his left hand, and he was eyeing the surrounding grounds.

"This," his Lord spoke to Thomas. "is James Kent. He's..." Thomas turned to the Lord, waiting the explanation.

"James is the son of a woman who passed away years ago. She was the woman who saved me and my family. James has been living with foster parents but has been working since he became of age at the residence of my cousin. He'll be second footman here, something slightly different from what he used to...work as." Thomas listened, but he still waited to know why he was summoned especially, and why this James Kent wasn't sent to be introduced to Carson first.

"Thomas, this is a very rare situation, and I'm going out of my usual common sense and behind the rest of my family to help James. I owe this woman that much, and I owe James that as well. Now, I want you to look after Jimmy, as I cannot do such a thing from my position. You may report to me anything particular, but for the most time I just want to know that he'll be good off, and I'm putting my trust on you. I know of your situation Thomas and I also know you've had a hard time making fit of that life. It is not for no reason that I want you to be the one looking after him. Don't get me wrong, he's no child but he's still young. He's also had a hard life, and I believe this position at Downton Abbey will make him content. Maybe also happy."

Throughout the Lord's conversation, Thomas had yet to say something. He'd been studying the man who now seemed to be inspecting the abbey from another standing point. Thomas focused on the Lord again, giving a nod.

"I understand your Lordship."

"You must also, not for any reason or in any situation, speak of anything I confided in your tonight. That could certainly cost your job. But I must know straight away if you're up to this task Thomas, or I must find other ways to keep this smooth." Thomas straightened, his many years in service teaching him not to be shocked by anything, rather see it all as opportunity and challenge.

"Most certainly your Lordship. I shall take Jimmy-I mean James here under my wing and teach him myself."

"It's important that you not let him know of my concern. He must not know he's being treated any different than the rest of the staff. Not that he is, but this is, as I said, a rare situation. That's all I had to say. Now, if you would please follow him inside and be present with him when formalities are being fixed with Mr. Carson. I suppose he can meet the others and get settled tomorrow. Tonight, I want him to know that he can count on you Thomas."

"Yes my Lord," Thomas replied. Lord Grantham called James over, and Thomas got to have a proper look at him for the first time, as he stepped into the dim light from the windows. He was indeed a young man, but Thomas quickly took note that he probably was a few years older than he seemed, being half a head shorter than himself and quite slim. As he lifted his gaze the shadow from this hat slipped, and Thomas was met by clear blue eyes and full lips. With a small smile and a nod of his head Thomas greeted him.

"Welcome James, this is Thomas Barrow, valet of Matthew Crawley. He's been here for some time so I decided he'd be fit for showing you inside."

"Thank you Lord Grantham. I look forward to work for you." James took his hat off, showing off blonde kept hair, set for a curl resting on his temple to the right that Thomas couldn't stop staring at. "Well then I'm off, good night." And Thomas and James were left.

"Let's get you inside, let me take your luggage, you must be tired from the journey." James followed him inside, silently but willingly letting Thomas aid to this belongings. It could hardly be much, for Thomas found the case light and immediately thought how James had probably not made a fortune at his old job, for there surely were no nice clothes save those he arrived in.

"We'll head straight to Mr. Carson. He's the butler and your work superior. After you'll dine with me and Carson seeing as we've not had a chance yet. Then I'll show you to your room. The rest will be taken care of tomorrow." They were approaching Carson's office, and with a knock Thomas let them in as he answered. Papers were settled, tasks instructed and room and fitted clothes given. Thomas suspected the Lord had given Carson notice of the arrangement with him and Jimmy, but that he knew no further detail, for Carson did not ask why Thomas was accompanying him, though he kept giving Thomas glances of curiosity. Carson hated being kept in the shadows of something going on downstairs – he was a man of charge for sure. Thomas couldn't help feeling satisfied that the Lord had given him a task even excluding Carson, so he had no way to keep up with it to see it through.

"Well then I guess you are settled James. Now let's have supper." Mrs. Patmore had left the food heating at the stove and three plates out, but it hadn't been a secret that a new employer would arrive one of these days. Dinner passed silently. Usually neither Carson or Thomas were the ones to chatter while eating, except when someone remarked something Carson wouldn't tolerate listening to while enjoying his meal. Thomas kept glancing at Jimmy, who only ate half is portion, but neither he or Carson commented on it.

"I'll settle for night then. I'm taking it Thomas will follow you to your room. I'll see you bright and early for breakfast as your schedule says. I'll take you through the rest then and have Thomas show you around. Welcome on board."

"Yes Mr Carson. Good night," Jimmy replied, and Carson left the two alone in the silent kitchen. Thomas cleared their plates and out of the corner of his eye he saw Jimmy once again scanning his surroundings.

"Never been in such a big house, it's quite a place," he remarked and Thomas looked up.

"Yes, well, we're all quite privileged to work here. His Lordship, Mr Crawley and Mr Branson are nice people. Not so sure about the women, but I guess Lady Sybil is all right. Should watch out for the old lady Grantham though, you never know where she'll take your mistake gossiping around." Jimmy absently held onto a chair.

"What about the other staff?" Thomas turned then, finished with the clearing. "Well, I'll leave it up to you to see for that. You'll meet them all in the morning, and then see them every day after that."

Thomas took his luggage once again from the hall and showed Jimmy to the boy's sleeping area. "Here's your room, you have the washing room just across from you, and mine's the one two doors down." Thomas entered the room and flicked the light on, also starting the heating.

"You'll find your uniform in your closet as well as towels and anything else you'll need. I'll show you all the other rooms and what you need to know tomorrow. Then we'll start your training." Jimmy placed his coat and hat on the bed and slumped down beside it.

"Jimmy?" Thomas questioned him, stepping closer. His eyes shoot up to him then.

"No one calls me that any more."

Thomas didn't know how well the Lord knew him or the other way around, but he kept from telling him that's what the Lord had called him as he'd spoken to Thomas.

"Mind if I do though? It suits you." Jimmy only shrugged. "But how come you'll be showing me everything, didn't Lord Grantham say you were a valet?"

"Indeed yes. But that's quite recent. I've been first footman for most of my time here. Lucky circumstances moved me up, so to say." Thomas didn't bother laying out the Bates story now.

"I see."

Thomas was staring at the loose lock of hair on his forehead again, and he really wanted to twitch it between his fingers, so this was the moment to leave. "Well, I can see you're tired so I'll leave you now. If there's every anything..." He trailed off. "Anything at all really, you can come to me. Carson is not always very understanding and well, it must be very serious to bring it up to the Lord. And I'm a tight seal if you want me to be. I've orders of that. You can trust me Jimmy." He gave his shoulder a squeeze to imply it, but Thomas sniggered himself for that thought. He also really wanted to touch him, feel his skin if it was really as smooth as it seemed. And those lips. He silently both damned and praised him for being so beautiful. But this one was dangerous. Even more so than usual, given the Lord's personal attachment to Jimmy. Thomas was certain there was one, ever so slight. There was some history with Jimmy's mother, history that probably even Jimmy knew limited about. No, Thomas really had to watch it this time. He gave Jimmy a last rare genuine smile, Thomas' one of many this night, before he went to leave.

"Wait." Jimmy had stood up and was walking over as Thomas turned, hand leaving the door knob. "I could really use some pain relief, I got a hit to my shoulder earlier."

Thomas furrowed his brows, wanting to question how that'd happened. "Let me have a look."

Jimmy began to shake his head, "Really, it's nothing serious-" but Thomas cut him off. "I'm a trained medic from the war. Let me have a look." Holding Jimmy's eyes for a moment, he finally gave in with a sight, backing a step and opening his waistcoat. Opening the buttons of his shirt he slid it off his left shoulder, giving Thomas a look at his slightly toned chest, all smooth skin like his face. Then he spotted his blue shoulder and dragged his shirt down further to see it running down several inches on his back along with a nasty cut that had stopped bleeding.

"Shit, who did this to you?" Jimmy wouldn't reply, trying to get his shirt back on. "It doesn't matter does it? I'm not going back there if I can help it." He was harsh now, voice cold. He'd seen a lot of ugly Thomas understood.

"Let me clean the cut and cover it. It could start bleeding again if you get any friction on it. I'm sure nothing is broken or you wouldn't have been able to still use your arm."

"I've had worse." Jimmy muttered but seemed to regret it a second later, gaze plastered to the tiny window in the corner of the room. Thomas couldn't help his feelings of pity. He himself had been in the war almost three years, Jimmy had been in war what seemed all his life.

"I'll be right back." He brought pain reliever, hot water and a cloth, and patches. "Cut isn't deep so not likely anything that could develop infection. I'd still like to check it again in a couple of days and to change the binding." Jimmy had removed his shirt all together and was sitting on the edge of his bed. Thomas drew up a chair from the corner by the closet and started trailing the damp cloth over his wounded backside. A few minutes later, having felt across the bones as well, he declared himself done. "Take the pain relievers and go to bed now. If the shoulder bothers you tomorrow please let me know."

"Yes. Thank you Thomas."

Jimmy was putting on a white shit to sleep in and Thomas made it to the door.

"Good night Jimmy."

Jimmy looked up at him as he turned in the door.

"Good night."

Thomas let his gaze linger another moment, holding Jimmy's, before he closed the door behind him. Finally in his own room he hurriedly rid himself of his clothes, sitting heavily onto the bed and resting his face in his hands. Whenever he closed his eyes he saw Jimmy's face. Deep blue eyes, pink lips, freckles over his nose that he'd noticed as he'd patched up his back. His kind small smile, haunted look of impassiveness when he'd shown him his shoulder. Thomas didn't sleep well that night, his dreams were not filled with scenes of him back in the war, but rather Jimmy stuck in a house of a battlefield. Waking with a start the next morning, shooting up from his bed, he found Jimmy opening his door to a creek, peering in.

"Thomas?"

"Come in" Thomas replied, voice raspy from only just waking up. Forehead damp from his livid dream.

"I'm sorry to disturb you this early, but I want to make a good impression my first day, and would like to know if I am decent." Jimmy stood straight, hands behind his back. Hair was kept like last night, still the little twirl of hair hanging loosely. He'd dressed in the dark green footman uniform, and Thomas had to admit he looked better than any other footman Downton had seen in years.

"Mm," Thomas kept inspecting him, but didn't allow himself to look too long and got out of bed, retrieving his own black uniform. "You'll do. Remember, it's your composition and words that count the most. Well, second to doing your tasks properly. The upstairs are the ones to impress, but Carson will be the one throwing daggers if he's not pleased with your work or attitude." Thomas got no response as he got his clothing ready and turned with raised eyebrows at Jimmy.

"All right, anything else?"

Thomas wanted nothing more than to warn him of certain...people, including himself, but he went for his old tactics instead. "Jimmy, I will not give you any privileges that other newcomers haven't received. Now, get your arse down in the kitchen and let me get dressed. I'm a valet, and I have to be ready for Mr. Crawley in thirty minutes." His tone was slightly harsher than he'd meant, but Thomas knew he couldn't let his façade slip. The others couldn't know anything of these arrangements if he didn't want his miserable life to turn even more miserable. Keeping his tensed back to Jimmy as he replied.

"I apologize for my intruding. I'll leave you then."

Thomas didn't really feel bad, it was necessary after all. And Jimmy was tough, like himself. He couldn't stop thinking of the way the Lord had looked at him as he'd spoken of Jimmy, or the cold hard look upon Jimmy's features as he'd exposed his beaten shoulder. He hated knowing that he'd been given a huge task by the Lord, a task that now seemed like it would break him even more. He had to slam the wall above his washing bowl with his good hand. Otherwise he was sure he'd strangle the Lord when he saw him later for putting him up to this. He needed a smoke before today's work started, and decided for once to skip breakfast.

Outside the morning was grey and dull, heavy clouds hung low, but it wouldn't rain. It fitted his mood so well he could've chuckled. Instead he took a last deep inhale of the pint before tossing it on the ground and stepping hard on it. Just where the Lord had been standing last night upon Jimmy's arrival.

It seemed fitting.

* * *

**Author's note:** If you're interested in more, let me know. I need to know if this is of interest. I have an idea worked out for this. Thank you for reading.


	2. Chapter 1 - Part 2

**Clouds**

~A Downton Abbey series

_Author:_ TopOfChaplin

_Pairing:_ Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent

_Other characters: _Lord Grantham, Lady Grantham, Mary, Edith, Sybil, Tom Branson, Matthew Crawley, Mrs. Crawley, Violet, Mrs. Patmore, Ms. O'Brien, Mrs. Hughes, Mr. Carson, Daisy, Ivy, Alfred

_Genres:_ Angst, Romance, Drama

_Rating:_ M

_Summary:_ A young man comes along who's had a rough past. Thomas is given orders to keep an extra eye on him by the Lord himself. But Thomas is damaged too, and what no one knows is that what they need is not acceptable. Not in 1920, and Downton Abbey is no exception. But the sky is quickly changing, and everyone will feel it as the clouds roll in. A dangerous change casting its shadows over the abbey.

_Acknowledgements:_ I do not own any of the characters, and all events are purely fictional. The story does not follow the series correctly at all times, and some circumstances are changed.

* * *

Cumulus - Part 2

_~** Cumulonimbus** is a dense towering vertical cloud associated with thunderstorms and atmospheric **instability**, and that occur from Cumulus clouds. ~_

"Now Jimmy, I expect you to remember what we went through this morning. You'll be doing the dinner serving today along with Alfred."

"Of course. I'm a quick learner Thomas," Jimmy replied in a modest tone as they were walking downstairs for lunch.

Thomas hadn't asked Jimmy about the greeting of the staff at breakfast, and Jimmy hadn't shared. Thomas would leave it to him for now, he had his own appearance to keep up around the others. As they entered they kitchen Ivy and Daisy were chattering about Jimmy but silenced as the two men entered, giggling to themselves. Jimmy gave them both a small smile, not shy, rather reserved, Thomas noticed.

"Now you two, help me get the food on the table will ya? It ain't moving itself." Mrs Patmore spoke to the kitchen maids with an extra glance in Jimmy's direction. She was not the first one to do that today. They were all curious to why an inexperienced footman had been given position with an Earl. Thomas seated himself in his usual seat and Jimmy sat down across from him. O'Brien and Alfred entered then, and Alfred sat next to Jimmy, already chatting away with him about the upcoming weekend.

"Ey Jimmy we might get Saturday afternoon off Carson says. The family is heading to dinner elsewhere. Thought we could head into town. Swooning of pretty girls that day a week," he spoke with a cheeky wink at Ivy.

"Don't you have better to do in your spare time than checking town girls up?" Daisy plotted in, noticing his flirting with Ivy.

Jimmy shrugged with a smile."Why not. Need to see this place other than the inside of the house."

Thomas pretended to busy himself with the days newspaper, sipping a strong coffee. He hated it when it got stale. "Careful not to catch trouble yet Jimmy. Alfred 'ere is a bit of a troublemaker."

"Thomas doesn't know how to humour himself. He's best at throwing nasty comments at people and smoke."

Thomas didn't even look up from the paper as he spoke. "Ivy dear, pour me some new coffee will you?" He gave her an honest smile as she did.

"Thank you," he empathized the words and gave Alfred a snug smirk, who frowned down on his plate. O'Brien watched it all from her seat at the far end, drinking it all and storing it up for a later occasion. Like she always did. It used to turn to trouble for someone at a later occurrence, but it had been weeks since she and Thomas had got conflicted when Alfred had showed up, pissing Thomas over the brick, and she had yet to bring something to the open. Alfred was less than pleased at Thomas' encounter with Ivy, and remained silent and grumpy through the rest of the meal.

Thomas was naturally good looking and could be charming when he wanted. Alfred was interested in Ivy, but Thomas observed her growing curiosity for Jimmy.

"Jimmy would never say such things like that Alfred. He's a proper gentleman," Daisy spoke, and Ivy nodded agreeing. "I'm sure you'll be a great footman with such charms and positive attitude," she told him all smiles.

"Oh well I do hope so. I like it here already." Jimmy kindly replied. Yes, Thomas could see how he would be likeable among the staff, and if he pulled off in his work as well he would surely be welcome to stay. Something about that fact should make him Thomas' natural enemy, but he was certain even if he didn't have it as an extra duty to look out for him, he'd want to help him. It was not like Jimmy threatened his position, and the downstairs had good of some fresh air breathed into it. Alfred and Ivy's recent joining hadn't exactly brought much but tension and juvenile drama.

There wasn't much to report during lunch. Mrs Hughes made small talk with Jimmy, and every now and then Anna, or Ivy would question him something. Thomas was starved when the food was served, yet he couldn't seem to eat much. He left the table at first chance and stepped outside in the back for his usual midday dose of nicotine.

"Can I have one of those?" a voice Thomas had been installed to like spoke behind him only a few minutes into his peaceful break. Thomas let out a lazy puff of smoke and turned slowly to gaze at him before retreating his head to scan the field in the distance.

"Not a chance. You're not a smoker."

"I've smoked before."

"Maybe, but you don't smoke."

Jimmy stepped up beside Thomas, who was leaning against the stone fence that parted the back area of the kitchen from the grounds. He didn't say anything but he was daring Thomas with his eyes. Thomas watched him for a moment before taking a long drag and dumping the pint, and exhaling him in the face. Breathing in the cotton cloud of smoke, Jimmy gave the tiniest cough and Thomas smirked, stepping past him before he did something ridiculously stupid that his imagination was running wildly through his mind.

"Don't do bets with Alfred, and don't take anything O'Brien says seriously. That's not advice, it's an order," Thomas told him over his shoulder.

"And how do I know it's not you I shouldn't listen to?" Jimmy replied baldly, but there was amusement in his tone. Thomas turned before the door.

"Maybe you shouldn't. But if I were you I would. For if you do, I can promise you the things I'll be teaching you the rest of the day will give you a free pass to first footman within the end of the month." Thomas went to go back inside, but caught Jimmy's grin over his shoulder first.

"Oh, and you probably shouldn't tell any of that to Alfred if you want to be saved of days of whining and sour blunter your way."

The rest of the day went by in a blur and its usual busy manner. By the time dinner was to be served upstairs, Jimmy proved himself exceptional, and Thomas didn't miss the nod of approval from the Lord. As they were clearing away and setting the table in the kitchen later, Thomas gave Jimmy's good shoulder a light squeeze, whispering "You can thank me later."

Jimmy smiled back, obviously pleased himself, but he did nothing to brag of it as he was complimented during the meal.

"You might not have the experience, but there is surely nothing that seems to show that you were not cut out for a job as a footman Jimmy. You certainly impressed upstairs tonight. Carson received positive words from both Lady Mary and the Lord himself." Mrs Hughes told Jimmy, her kind smile directed at him.

Carson cleared his throat. "That is true Mrs Hughes. But remember this was only his first day. Now, we'll see how it goes the next few weeks. He has still things to learn, and more challenging tasks to meet."

Mrs Hughes gave him a look and he added, "But your first day could definitely have been a lot worse."

Thomas felt like snickering to that, but it was Carson's way to say he was pleased, and there was no need to ruin the good mood around the table tonight. Alfred even gave Jimmy's back a good slap, not knowing Jimmy's outstanding meant stepping down for himself yet. Thomas had to bite his inner cheek to not throw a comment on the action to Alfred as he saw Jimmy wincing ever so slightly from the contact.

It was late and everyone had headed to bed, but Thomas waited up for Mr Crawley's return from London and went to the kitchen for a cup of tea. Surprised, he found Jimmy sitting by the old piano.

"You should play something," Thomas spoke, trying for casual as he waited for the pot of water to boil.

"It's late."

"You should play."

"Someone might be disturbed."

"I want to hear you play."

Jimmy didn't turn his head but he could still see Thomas in his side view. Slowly he started pressing the white and black keys. The tune was most beautiful Thomas noted, yet so sad. He'd never heard it before still it made him think of himself as a young boy. Confused, scared, having nightmares about the grand clock in the house that would tick faster and faster. And angry. He'd been so angry at his father when his mother had died. Angry when he'd sent him away to work. Angry at a God he'd never really believed in.

Now his pulse was too high, throbbing against his neck and hammering in his chest.

"Stop,"

he found himself blurt out, but Jimmy kept playing.

As the tune drifted off, lingering in the air, Thomas' tea was long forgotten. Jimmy stared at him as he stood, but Thomas couldn't focus on him, eyes staring into the air. Without a word Jimmy left, and a few minutes later the bell summoned Thomas back to present. Taking a deep breath and fixing his clothing, he headed off to meet Mr. Crawley in the entrance hall.

"Mr. Barrow, thank you for waiting up."

Laying in bed later Thomas stifled his sobs in his pillow, not even knowing any more why he was weeping, but he couldn't stop. All he knew was that Jimmy sat with his faith in his actions, for Thomas had tried and failed yet again to not feel. But all the time spent concentrating on not feeling had left him shallow and empty. Space that Jimmy had crawled into since his hopeful eyes had met his own outside the front door of the abbey, a seemingly beautiful man, with something locked up inside.

In the room two doors up, Jimmy sat on the floor, back to his bed, glancing at the clock on his night table as it ticked close to eleven, trying to keep his hands from shaking. Checking four times that his door was locked, before he fell asleep on the floor, clutching his pillow. Pocked knife within arms length.

* * *

"So you were in the army," Jimmy confirmed as he stood in Thomas' room the next morning.

This time on Thomas' request. He hadn't had the time yesterday to ask about his shoulder and did a quick check before Jimmy completed his dressing. At Jimmy's words, Thomas' eyes left his work on his collar, immediately going to his hat hanging down on the wall opposite his bed.

"Front first, wounded, and then an army doctor. Ran Downton a time at the end."

Thomas didn't like to speak of the war. Mostly because of the triggered memories from the front, but also his inner struggle as he returned. He'd been most head high with pride for leading Downton when it had wounded soldiers. But mostly it was a constant reminder of his own cowardice. The cowardice that had saved him, and the bravery that had killed so many others, or damaged them beyond repair.

"So I've heard. Ms O'Brien spoke rather fondly of your time in leadership."

"Bet she did."

"You know, none of the others quite understand why I bother to talk to you. Say I'll be good off when I'm finished trained for my job."

Thomas went to comb his hair back, never meeting Jimmy's eyes through the mirror. Thomas had waited for this, waited for the fall back from the other servants. Not even O'Brien was to be counted on now, though Thomas suspected she'd never really been more interested than to build him up to watch him break, and to have someone to share her sniggering with at the time. And steal fags from, surely she owed him greatly. Jimmy stepped closer.

"What a surprise." Thomas said indifferent.

"But they don't understand you do they. And you think I don't understand so you push me away. Better arrogant than weak, better mean than broken," he whispered to each of Thomas' ears, and his grip on the comb tightened to the point of pain in his palm. In his bad hand.

Jimmy's gaze left the mirror as he turned his back. Thomas bolted up then, realization dawning on him "He did this to you did he not? Came into your room at night and beat you to blood."

"Trying to beat sense into me he said." Jimmy didn't turn again as he spoke.

"You don't like to speak about the war because of fear. I don't like to speak of my war because of fear of meeting it again. I think we can leave it at that Mr. Barrow." His voice was soft and strained, but utterly composed.

And from that moment Thomas had the slightest of respect from the young footman. For Thomas knew pure stinging fear, and he would never, ever forget it. Getting up Thomas crossed the room in three swift strides, halting only centimetres from Jimmy.

"Let's stay out of the battlefield then shall we?" Jimmy nodded.

"Now, we have another day waiting and I'll be showing you the rest of your duties today. Starting with number one, a lesson in not being fired: know when to remain silent and never listen to any orders from Ms. O'Brien."

"Thought we'd established the O'Brien trouble already."

"Well, it's worth mentioning again."

"And remaining silent when found guilty of Carson is a must?"

"Excellent, I can see your way to success already James Kent."

"Well if it were to come to that, I do own it all to my outstanding teacher."

"Keep thinking that thought."

Jimmy could not remember the last time he'd felt so bright, having something to look forward to. And Thomas could not remember the last time he'd smiled as carefree and honest, and it almost scared him, but only almost for it felt too good.

* * *

"There'll be thunder tonight Jimmy, I'm sure of it. Care to join me for a walk then?"

Jimmy strained his head up to look at Thomas as they walked through the servants hall to the kitchen.

"I suppose, must be jolly to take a stroll in such lovely weather," Jimmy mocked.

Thomas snickered. "Not really. But it is a lot more fun to inspect the powerhouse when you can actually turn the power back on."

"Oh."

Mrs Hughes came out of her drawing room then and gave them both a knowing look. "Not putting the poor boy up for any mischief I hope...Mr Barrow."

He smiled strained at her as she left them to follow behind.

"Are you though?" Jimmy spoke with a hushed tone, but there was lightness in it. Thomas did not get to reply before Carson spoke up.

"Thunder you say, I haven't seen a dark cloud all day. Better show him something useful, like how to go to bed at a proper time. Nothing is worse than having to tell the footman to not fall asleep when he's serving breakfast," he trailed off with a hard tone, looking directly at Alfred who looked down, ashamed. Jimmy stood straight, waiting for a lesson of his own, and Thomas was quite amused.

"Certainly Mr Carson. Better not let him have that night off this weekend, I'm sure he'd be spending it...not sleeping," Thomas humoured in. Mr Carson seemed to contemplate it for a moment, giving Thomas a stern look before eyeing the guilty party.

"Best thing I've heard all day Mr Barrow, and to think it coming from _you_." He empathized you with a pause before continuing. "Alfred you'll be working Saturday night, and I will not hear any objections. And if I'm pleased with your work I'll consider it again next week. Now, lunch before the bell rings, we have work to do as Lord and lady Grantham are preparing their journey tomorrow."

Lunch went by, and Thomas kept a discreet eye at Jimmy, noting how he had both ears in the depths of the table conversations. Mostly listening to Carson's ongoing concern for the next big dinner when there'd be visitors from Scotland in a few weeks, already making cleaning schedules. Alfred was silent too beside Jimmy, though for obvious other reasons.

As they strolled out after supper, Thomas questioned him about it. "Why you were all ears earlier at lunch. Anything up your sleeve already?"

Jimmy shrugged, pulling his coat tighter, gazing up in the dark. "Just trying to fall into things. A listener learns more than a speaker."

"I suppose."

Thomas lightened a smoke.

"Seems you were right about the thunder, and I must confess, I'd like to know how you do it."

"Do what?"

"Predict it. Read the weather signs."

"Could've been lucky guess for all you know."

Jimmy met his eyes with raised brows. "But it wasn't."

Taking a long drag, Thomas replied.

"No it wasn't."

Then he smirked before speeding up. "And it'll be drizzling soon enough too, so hurry up." Jimmy shook his head, slightly amused, but hurried along as the cracks of thunder broke through the sky for the third time.

"Bloody hell how do you know what's what in this moulder?"

"You don't, not really. But this is the main switch, always try that one first if the power goes. And if not, then you start somewhere and go through them all until you find the right one."

Jimmy was peering over his shoulder, standing on his toes. "You suppose it'll go out tonight?"

"It might. The wide open surroundings prove this the point of most power shut downs probably in all of the county. Though if it's the main power line it usually recovers on its own." Thomas checked the rest of the fuses before closing it up. Jimmy was peering out one of the two small windows facing towards the abbey.

Thomas dared to take a strike.

"So what did you do then, in your former employment position?"

"Oh bits of that and some of this. I didn't have any specific position, used me for whatever they preferred." Jimmy's voice was distant again. A fact Thomas gladly would have exploited had he been anyone else.

"Seems a bit...chaotic if you ask me. Would have thought the house of one of the Earl's acquaintances would be of more order."

Jimmy laughed coldly then, absent mindedly drawing on the fog on the corner of the glass. "I'm sorry for intruding on the subject again."

"Yes well, I suppose you are curious of my...experience." The way Jimmy said those words sent chills down Thomas' back, and another rumble of thunder broke the stretching silence. The rain was coming down heavy now and Jimmy smirked.

"Okay how 'bout this, you reveal your hidden talents and I'll tell you some of mine."

Thomas took a seat on some wooden boxes that read _'Property of British army, Medical Section'_, that had been stocked here two years prior or so, and thought a second of the irony in that.

"Hidden talent, and who said I have such?"

Jimmy shrugged. "Oh none, but everyone has."

Leaning back and straightening his hat, Thomas thought for a moment. "Well I'm a fair enough dancer I would say. And I know how to repair clocks. I'm also brilliant in cricket, and chess if I want to be. And I'm a good liar too I suppose, or maybe it's just everyone else who's terrible at interpreting and reading people."

A breathing pause. "Now you."

Jimmy left the window. "You sure you want to know though? I'd have to sworn you to secrecy of a lifetime."

The chills returned to Thomas of Jimmy's tone, and when he looked up to meet the eyes of the valet, Thomas swore he saw Jimmy's lip quivering for a moment. "But first I have to know if I'm right."

"Right about what?" Thomas' voice sounded weak to himself, and maybe a quarter of an octave too high.

"Your preference. Of...people."

Thomas' heart was beating wildly by now, but it wasn't even a secret what Jimmy was about to confirm. With Thomas' slight hesitation Jimmy had his confirmation.

"You're different as they so hesitantly calls it, but you can't help it can you?"

Thomas couldn't look Jimmy in the eyes any longer.

"Oh but Thomas you are not the one who should be uneasy. You see I have talents. I'm a great baker for one, and an excellent fire maker. I play piano and violin and sing. I can entertain with card tricks too. Oh, he liked that very much my former employer."

Jimmy got up and waltzed over to where Thomas sat stiff.

"But there were other talents he cherished even greater. Talents he'd give me rewards for. Dinner for instance, if I did exceptionally well. And a rare time he was more than sated he would let me go a few days without a mark upon my skin."

Thomas was fighting the urge to run but kept still as a rock, eyes glued to the ground. Jimmy leaned down, voice sounding strong but foreign.

"Yes indeed Mr. Barrow, I have such great talents. Wouldn't really come handy as a footman though would they, or perhaps they would. Wouldn't you know, Thomas."

The next second Jimmy's cheek stung as Thomas slapped him hard, and then Thomas was out the door and he didn't even bother to turn and collect his hat that fell off in the process.

Jimmy stood breathing hard behind as the sound of the thunder echoed off the sound of Thomas' last steps out and into the storm.

* * *

**Authors note:** Thanks to all who've supported my story so far. I love to hear from you. For those curious to Jimmy's past, things are not all clear yet but bits and pieces wil come soon enough. A couple hints were revealed in this chapter though, I wonder if any of you caught any of them. Any feedback is appreciated, so pretty please leave a review my fellow Lords, Ladys, footmen, servants and maids (oh whatever floats your boat, I couldn't resist). And thank you for reading.


	3. Chapter 2 - Part 1

**Clouds**

~ A Downton Abbey series

_Author: _TopOfChaplin

_Pairing: _Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent

_Other characters: _Lord Grantham, Lady Grantham, Mary, Edith, Sybil, Tom Branson, Matthew Crawley, Mrs. Crawley, Violet, Mrs. Patmore, Ms. O'Brien, Mrs. Hughes, Mr. Carson, Daisy, Ivy, Alfred

_Genres:_ Angst, Romance, Drama

_Rating:_ M

_Summary:_ A young man comes along who's had a rough past. Thomas is given orders to keep an extra eye on him by the Lord himself. But Thomas is damaged too, and what no one knows is that what they need is not acceptable. Not in 1920, and Downton Abbey is no exception. But the sky is quickly changing, and everyone will feel it as the clouds roll in. A dangerous change casting its shadows over the abbey.

_Acknowledgements: _I do not own any of the characters, and all events are purely fictional. The story does not follow the series correctly at all times, and some circumstances are changed.

* * *

Altocumulus - Part 1

_~ Altocumulus may appear as parallel bands or rounded masses. Typically a portion of an altocumulus cloud is **shaded**, a characteristic which makes them **distinguishable** from other cloud types ~_

"Could I have a word with his Lordship," Thomas said as he bolted into the drawing room the next morning, and it was more as a statement than a question. He'd waited only long enough for them to finish eating, and Lord Grantham wrinkled his brows, Lady Mary and her Ladyship also eyeing the valet – concern etching their looks.

"Mr. Barrow I don't think this is the proper time-" Mr. Carson started saying from his place by the door, but the Lord cut him off.

"Yes if the matter is urgent certainly. If you would follow me to the north library."

As the door was closed behind them the Lord took a seat by his desk. "My Lord-" Thomas started but the Lord cut him off.

"I want you to know first Thomas that if this has anything to do about Jimmy's past I wont hear of it."

Thomas went silent at once and the Lord sighted, digging in one of the drawers and pulling out a letter."If you would just tell me my Lord, was this any form of blackmail?"

The Lord turned to look at Thomas as he spoke."Not at all. What I told you when Jimmy arrived is the truth, but I'm afraid that is all I can tell you."

"But why bring him here to work? I'm certain another place would have been more suitable-"

"Nowhere else would have been suitable Thomas." The Lord's tone was harsh now and Thomas looked down.

"I believe he has told you then, who his former employer was."

Thomas nodded. "More or less, yes."

"And I hope you understand that by keeping an eye out for him you have to keep whatever he confides to you secret."

"By all means yes my Lord."

The letter in the Lord's hand was put back in the drawer and locked."He has a dark past, but he's not a bad person. And I hope you will come to discover that as well Thomas." The Lord stared longingly out the window, and Thomas could almost read a form of sadness in his gaze. Though he could not be sure, for he'd seen so much raw sorrow, the Lord could almost be interpreted as indifferent compared.

"I shall leave you then my Lord." With a bow of the head Thomas left, but not without a last glance at the second drawer and the key the Lord held tightly onto.

* * *

Thomas didn't see Jimmy before after lunch time as he was set to polish glass in the drawing room as the family paid a visit to the Crawley house. Thomas entered to prepare the room for guests later when he stopped in his tracks upon seeing Jimmy. Thinking about turning to leave Thomas headed for the door again but changed his mind the last second and closed the door behind them. Jimmy carried on facing the windows in the room and Thomas watched his back for a moment before coming to stand beside him.

"Use the other side of the clot or you'll scrub your hands raw with effort."

Jimmy gave him a quick wary glance but did as Thomas said.

"When you're finished meet me in the music room," Thomas spoke in a low but serious tone, and Jimmy knew better than to question him. Thomas left the room and went downstairs, meeting Daisy as he entered the kitchen.

"What's James on about? Promised he'd help out cleaning in the kitchen."

"James was instructed to do work upstairs this afternoon Daisy. I suggest you haul Alfred with you, he's been slumbering' in the backyard for the past hours," Thomas said in a bored tone. He was exhausted spending half the night pacing his room thinking about the affairs the previous night. O'Brien came down the hall, a wicked smirk upon her features and her usual sneaky attitude.

"See you 'ave your preference ready. Don't think I don't know Thomas. When I told him 'bout ya he didn't even seem surprised. You been on to him already 'ave ya?" Thomas' jaw tensed.

"Oh but for once you are completely mistaken O'Brien."

They didn't get to anything else for Mrs Hughes was approaching them, eyes tight and arms at her hips. "Now if you two are just standing around you may just as well help Mrs Patmore in the kitchen. Everything is having a shine up before Christmas."

"You'll have to excuse me Mrs Hughes, I am needed in the music room." Mrs Hughes looked at him but dismissed him, and then on to Ms O'Brien.

"I suppose you are not needed anywhere Ms O'Brien. Her Ladyship will ring the bell when she's returned from the Crawley house. We all must lend an extra hand now and then and I believe it is your turn." Thomas smirked at O'Brien behind Mrs Hughes back, who looked displeased to the point of whipping out at him again, but she was called for once again from the kitchen and took off.

"Mr Barrow if I could just have a quick word before you go," Mrs Hughes said as she returned, catching Thomas halfway up. Thomas willingly went back downstairs and Mrs Hughes took him into her drawing room. A small smile hovered on her lips and Thomas was profoundly confused, waiting a banter as usual.

"I'm glad to see you taking James under your wing. Mr Carson and I have not been told much of his situation but we know he's had quite a different life than the rest of us. I was afraid he wouldn't be up for the work but you've taught him well Thomas. I hope to see this continuing. Now, I was to say from Mr Carson to take the afternoon off. Both of you. Just be back again at seven sharp for the dinner serving."

"Are you sure Carson said that?" Thomas smirked and Mrs Hughes shook her head with a small smile.

"Oh you know how he is. But I put in a good word for you. Thought he could need a little time off before the Christmas rush starts. I know a little kindness now and then Mr Barrow."

"Thank you Mrs Hughes."

She turned her head a bit, studying him for a moment before shaking her head. "Oh I don't think I'll ever get the hang of you, but don't go do something wicked to disappoint me." Thomas only gave a wry small smile and bowed himself out. He was already making plans in his head and maybe they were not up to impose trouble, but they were certainly not entirely legal. But then again Thomas never counted on being caught, and the times when he was, well, he was only human after all. And then again his position had never been safer so he supposed he could get away with quite a bit.

"But work another hour first, it's not even two o'clock," she ordered in her usual respectable manner.

"That was the plan Mrs Hughes."

* * *

"Why did you summon me here? I hope you don't think I'll give a demonstration."

Thomas was confused for half a second before following Jimmy's gaze to the violins in the corner. "Oh no, quite the opposite."

Jimmy was the one to be confused now.

"Winding the clock. First footman should know how to. I'm interested in your violin playing though, I'll let his Lordship know you'll be playing on the next concert." Jimmy gave him a look with raised eyebrows before he looked away.

"Come here," Thomas ordered at last as silent tension began easing its way into them. He knew he had to bring up the situation in the power house sooner or later but for the moment he let it be. "Now, put your hand on the big needle and feel the resistance."

Jimmy did as he was told. "I feel it."

"Good. Now, listen."

A heartbeat and then another.

"What am I listening to?"

Thomas leant over him, placing his lips dangerously close to Jimmy's ear. "It's soul, it speaks. Don't you hear?"

Jimmy smiled huffing as if he'd told a silly joke.

"Oh well, probably a good thing I'm the only one who can hear it. Mostly the clocks in this house just nag about the boring business goin' on in the rooms anyway. They particularly seem to have something against old Lady Grantham. Couldn't dare to think why."

Jimmy gave a tiny laugh and Thomas couldn't help but think him beautiful, and he couldn't let go of the blood boiling thought of anyone hurting him. After showing him what to do if the clock went too fast or too slow, he revealed the news of the half-half day they'd been given.

"Must be little work to do today or something. Or maybe they're tired of your face downstairs already," Thomas said lightly as they made their exit from the music room towards the attic.

"Don't care, just eager to get outside for a while. I don't suppose there are any horses nearby?" Thomas stopped as they entered the boy's hall.

"Why, you fond of them?"

Jimmy shrugged, "I'll tell you all about it if you'll show me some."

"Very well then. Get changed and we'll go."

* * *

The first hour of their freedom was spent walking the frosted grounds and visiting the nearest stall where they borrowed a brown horse with a long white star on his forehead. Thomas learned a horse had been Jimmy's coping as his parents had died leaving him alone. He also learned that Jimmy loved spring and reading and hated walking if he could run instead. He couldn't swim and he feared rifles. Thomas told him about his drawing habits and love for unicorns no one knew. And making the dull life in the abbey excitable, telling him about particular incidents that would have sent Carson off his feet had he found out about them.

Thomas was leading them down to the river not far from the house, where Jimmy fastened the horse to a tree before pulling his jacked closer. It had turned noticeably colder today that yesterday, and the clear weather earlier had sunk the degrees lower. Thomas had a cigarette ready in his mouth, the first since they'd gone outside, Jimmy noted.

"Like this place. You can only just not see the house, and no pats run around where cars rustle or wagons come rollin'," Thomas said, putting his hands in the pockets of his hip length grey coat. Jimmy patted the horse and went onto the small brew, watching the river running slowly, halted by ice along the banks.

"He never kissed me," Jimmy said out of the blue.

Thomas stepped closer, also watching the stream.

"Said he parted his personal slaves from his affairs that way. I was there to please him when no one else was."

Thomas took all the information in but kept mute and tense, and completely still.

"Often spoke fondly of a raven haired footman at Downton Abbey, but he never said what you two had." He paused a moment, retrieving a stone from his trouser pocket and throwing it in the smooth water, breaking its fluency for a few seconds before it continued on as if nothing had disturbed its running. "So I did as he said, whatever he said, and it made me cry in the beginning for I was drawn to him and I wanted to kiss him. I tried once and he brought the whip out. So I never tried again."

Thomas spoke for the first time since Jimmy's opening up. "Thought we agreed not to set foot in these wounds-"

"I owe you an explanation. And then I trust you for some wild reason." Jimmy's voice shook with emotion and he threw another stone, this one smaller. Thomas took another step and they were side by side. He threw the cigarette in the water, that he had only taken two drags from.

"He promised to take me with him when he was last visiting, eight years ago now. Then he changed his mind." He lifted his gaze to look at Jimmy. "I could have killed him knowing what he did to you," Thomas confided, bitterness etching his words.

Jimmy broke the slight eye contact they'd had, but let his left hand hanging in the airspace between them. Wordlessly and as if it was the most natural thing in the world, Thomas reached his over and took Jimmy's shaking hand in his. He could feel how raw and bruised his knuckles still were.

And then Jimmy let himself cry for the first time in months, for someone understood him, someone knew and someone cared. And maybe he wasn't fucked up beyond repair after all. And then Thomas never let go of his hand.

* * *

Thomas always thought he'd build up a heart of stone during all his years at Downton and after the war, even though he wore his emotions on his sleeve. It was his way of protecting himself from breaking again, to keep going everyday. And then Jimmy showed up all wounded on the inside and out, and Thomas promised himself to not get attached. He hated when he couldn't keep his own vows.

"I spent countless hours reading his letters to you that he never sent. He always addressed to you as, _my dearest._" Jimmy stopped loosening the strap from the branch to look up at Thomas. "I kept wondering if you were really as handsome as he described you."

Thomas would have smirked had it not been for the look of pain upon Jimmy's features. Jimmy looked away abruptly, getting the horse ready. "Then suddenly a week ago the Duke wasn't in his room when I went to him, and I was told I'd been offered a job here. No idea where he went or what he's doing but he was moving away for some time. I suppose he must have left a very good reference on me though. Then I started wondering if the Duke's heart breaker was still around. And there you were, just as he described you and cherished you in the letters."

Thomas had loved the Duke once, but he'd been hurt and abandoned. And now so many years after he meets Jimmy who's sweet and kind even after being a victim of abuse for an unknown amount of time to Thomas. Thomas might be a troubled soul, but Jimmy was a broken one. But somehow Jimmy was strong, stronger than Thomas, and Thomas knew that. Jimmy could smile and laugh around other people while Thomas held everyone at arms length, unable to express happiness when everything inside him had crumbled.

Jimmy got onto the horse's back, and Thomas wanted to tell Jimmy that the bastard of a Duke hadn't done him anything good and that he was placed at Downton for other reasons than the intentions of the Duke. But he knew he had to keep the Lord's words confidentially to himself if he wanted to keep his job. Petting the horse's head for a moment before he said, "Go on then Joey, go on then boy," and giving him a final weak slap by his front legs so that he started walking.

"I didn't know you knew any of the horses," Jimmy asked amused as he and Joey tripped away from the river and up the field.

"No not really. But my unicorns know them so then I know them a bit as well."

Jimmy smiled, a full teeth smile that reached his eyes, before he and Joey went full trot, and due to the wall of fog descending because of the cold the last half hour, they were soon unclear in the distance to Thomas. Finding another cigarette he went after them in his own pace, glancing at the sky now and then. A tug in the corner of his lips, almost a small smile formed as he made his way over the grass where he heard Jimmy shouting encouragements to Joey as they sped up and rounded Thomas in big circles.

"Enlighten me then," Thomas said with amusement in his voice as they closed up.

"What, to boost your big ego?" Jimmy mocked, cheeks flushed from the cold. None of then had bothered with headgear as there was no one else to see them.

"Oh trust me, it hasn't been given much to go on lately."

Jimmy halted the well-trained horse in front of him. "Well Mr. Barrow, you are not a bad sight. And you are most definitely more handsome than I could have imagined. I do not think the Duke's words did you justice." Jimmy's tone was light, playful, but then his features turned serious and he slid off the horse's back, patting it and whispering for it to stay.

Thomas watched impressed as Joey stabbed his left front foot on the ground once and stood halted on the spot. Jimmy came closer, eyes bright in the cool air, hair tussled from the riding. Thomas was again struck with his youthfulness, but the wrinkles between his brows revealed his lost innocence.

"I'm sorry for the things I said yesterday. For a moment I wanted to see you hurt for I knew you were the one who held his heart. I regretted it at once when you were out the door for then it hit me. I never envied you for the right reasons. And I hate him for doing what he did to me. My hands were tied, my life depended on him keeping me in his service. I would never have wanted to stay with him now even if he changed."

"I'm sorry I slapped you," Thomas replied, hesitantly bringing his hand up to the cheek it'd connected with the previous night. For a moment he was about to pull back though, but the longing he saw in Jimmy's eyes froze his movement and his hand hovered millimetres away. Waiting another heartbeat to see if Jimmy would wrench his head away, giving him the chance to back out and leave nothing between them.

But Jimmy kept his eyes at Thomas' and Thomas let his fingertips trail down his cheekbone before pressing his palm to the rosy skin. A thousand warnings rung in Thomas' ear but he dismissed them all, caught up in the feel of the soft skin and the lazy gaze of Jimmy. Their moment was interrupted with Joey's whine, and Jimmy laughed.

"Go then boy, come here."

The fog would condensate soon Thomas concluded as the shadow of the abbey was becoming clearer in the distance. "Hopefully we'll be able to see bubbly clouds soon as the weather clears up again," Thomas said with his head pointed slightly up. Jimmy was up in the saddle again and holding Joey in a grip long enough to answer.

"I'll teach you some Latin words later if you indulge me on your deducting ways." Thomas lowered his eyes to meet Jimmy's.

"Fair enough, if those will be handy words."

Jimmy only smiled, kicking his heels lightly into the brown stallion, before shouting as he left, "Non plaudite., modo pecuniam jacite. Ave atque vale."

The sound of hooves echoed through the landscape long after they were out of sight. Thomas stubbed the third cigarette today that was only half finished.

* * *

**Author's note:** First of all thank you all for reading and leaving reviews, they keep me inspired to write more. A few things were revealed in this chapter and I was happy to see some of you taking the clues. I left a few in this chapter as well, but mainly I focused on an understanding and air cleaning between Thomas and Jimmy. I really like the fact that Jimmy knows latin for I know a bit myself (I've had medical latin and basic latin), so I thought I'd include some of that. As to a translation of the latin I did not feel like including it in this chapter because Thomas does not get it. This will be further explained so stick with me. Now off you go to leave me some words yeah? Splendid.


	4. Chapter 2 - Part 2

**Clouds**

~ A Downton Abbey series

_Author: _TopOfChaplin

_Pairing: _Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent

_Other characters: _Lord Grantham, Lady Grantham, Mary, Edith, Sybil, Tom Branson, Matthew Crawley, Mrs. Crawley, Violet, Mrs. Patmore, Ms. O'Brien, Mrs. Hughes, Mr. Carson, Mr Molesley, Daisy, Ivy, Alfred

_Genres:_ Angst, Romance, Drama

_Rating:_ M

_Summary:_ A young man comes along who's had a rough past. Thomas is given orders to keep an extra eye on him by the Lord himself. But Thomas is damaged too, and what no one knows is that what they need is not acceptable. Not in 1920, and Downton Abbey is no exception. But the sky is quickly changing, and everyone will feel it as the clouds roll in. A dangerous change casting its shadows over the abbey.

_Acknowledgements: _I do not own any of the characters, and all events are purely fictional. The story does not follow the series correctly at all times, and some circumstances are changed.

* * *

Altocumulus - Part 2

_~ Altocumulus Perlucidus is sometimes found preceding a **weakening** warm front ~_

Jimmy sat crossed-legged on a pile of wood outside the back of the abbey, Thomas lay on the bench below with his head propped up and feet casually resting on one of its arms. They still had two hours before they had to be back inside to get ready for work and despite the cold they preferred being outside for the time being, and now the sun even shone through on the sky. The kitchen or sitting area wasn't an option because of the cleaning and Thomas already spent all his free time either there or in his bedroom. Jimmy wanted to hit the pub but they both knew it wasn't a good move before a serving and they didn't have the time to get down there and back anyway.

"You can come with me to Thirsk this Saturday," Thomas said after a while spent in silent pondering.

"What you up to then?"

"Well bit of this and bit of that. Sending a telegram for one, and picking up a few things for his Lordship. I'm sure Mrs Patmore wishes something as well, and as a footman it's your duty and not mine so we might pursue Carson to let the two of us go."

Jimmy gave an honest bright smile, one of many today that Thomas had seen. "Oh it's been so long since I've had a stroll anywhere. And just being outside...I was mostly to keep inside before, and having lived on a farm as a young boy, well, you can imagine."

"I'm afraid I can, yes." Thomas was having a weird moment, feeling compassion for another member of the staff for the first time. Angling his head so he could look up at Jimmy, he felt a surge of protectiveness wash over him watching the younger boy lost in horrid memories. He saw his own childhood reflected in Jimmy's eyes when he spoke about his recent past. Jimmy met Thomas' eyes for a splint second before gazing out in the air and taking a few deep breaths.

"I'd forgotten what fresh air felt like, and sunshine warming my skin."

He closed his eyes then and Thomas couldn't look away from his pale fluttering long eyelashes against his porcelain face, and how his brows relaxed. He could see why the Duke had found him irresistible but he couldn't fathom how he'd still been in love with himself when he'd had Jimmy. He also had a fine bodice, that Thomas could tell even before he'd seen Jimmy shirtless. That thought reminded him,

"Come see me tonight will you? I bothers me that the gash hasn't healed on its own yet."

Jimmy's eyes remained closed, head titled to meet the rays escaping through at the moment. "If you say so."

The reply was short and Thomas could have interpreted it as uneasiness but he seemed to know Jimmy fairly well already, and knew it was the topic and not the action that bothered him. Jimmy was at ease with his body, he'd have to be, but not the scaring that would forever be reminders of something ugly. Thomas had ugly scars as well, though most of them were on the inside.

"All right," Thomas began and squirmed a bit to get comfortable, or as comfortable as one could be on hard steel splinters and being outside in November. Jimmy opened his eyes and peered down at him. "The real clue is to read the signs in everything in nature, not just the sky. The animals have instincts on the weather. The moisture in the air and on the ground must be noticed as well. And of course the current clouds and wind."

Jimmy let his feet hang off the edge, forearms resting on his calves as he intently and interested, listened to Thomas.

"It all goes in patterns, builds up to the next thing. You have to watch the shape, the colour, how it moves, how high or low it is." Pointing with his hand, Thomas picked the few white clouds hanging high on the sky. "Notice how slowly they move. Almost no wind. Earlier today it was misty, and just one big lump. But now they've parted, gone higher and is letting sun through. They're building up to a warm front, all moving in the same direction."

Jimmy squinted and followed his gaze to Thomas' line of vision.

"Nimbus," Jimmy said in a soft voice, still watching the clouds.

Thomas looked at him waiting for an explanation.

"It's the Latin word for cloud. Did you know they categorize clouds in Latin names?"

Thomas absently scraped his boots against the wood. "I know they do, but I don't know any of the names."

"I'll look it up, I think there's a section of it in my book."

Thomas sat up and dug his pockets for a smoke. Jimmy slid down from the sack he'd been occupying and took a seat beside Thomas. "Not gettin' any," Thomas murmured, referring to the white paper roll with tobacco between his lips.

"Wasn't gonna ask for," Jimmy replied. "I just like the smell of it. Always have. My dad smoked in our living room when I was little, and the smell reminds me of home, of good times."

Thomas took a small drag and exhaled, letting smoke wander in Jimmy's direction. "So whatever did you say earlier?" Thomas questioned, feeling much warmer now with the smoke in his chest.

Jimmy smirked. "Just a quotation from a book I read, and then greetings and goodbye. If you should remember any of it remember the greeting salve. It's both a hello and bidden goodbye, and it's still widely used today."

"But why Latin? Why not French or Greek or Spanish?"

Jimmy shrugged, looking down on the ground. "It was more exciting. And then the Duke knew French and therefore also understood Spanish well enough. I could write letters he couldn't read, and I could swear and shout angry words at him that he couldn't comprehend."

Thomas finally begun to understand that the majority of Jimmy's personality was built around the Duke in one way or another. "For how long were you there?" Thomas finally found the guts to ask, for he was indeed dreading the answer.

Jimmy shrugged heavily with his shoulders again, swallowing noticeably. "Seven years. Had only turned eighteen when mum sent me. Father had just been reported dead and she dreaded they would send me to war as well when I was of age. I guess her intentions were good, and she was scared and desperate."

"His Lordship said you'd lived with foster parents."

"Only a year. Mother got sick when I was seventeen. Heart problems. But it was the Spanish flu that killed her in the end. I really only slept at my foster parent's house, and visited mum at the hospital almost everyday."

Thomas puzzled that for a moment. "He also said you worked at his cousin's household."

Jimmy laughed then, but it was bitter. "Trying to keep it a secret that it was the Duke of Crowborough. So I was told to say that if anyone probed."

"Couldn't imagine why," Thomas muttered.

They sat in silence then, only the sounds of nature buzzing but even that was rather quiet, half asleep in the winter months. The sun was low on the sky by the time Jimmy spoke again. "When did you find out? About yourself."

The corners of Thomas' mouth turned up ever so slightly. "Was a sweet girl crushin' on me, and when she kissed me I felt nothin'. The next night I dreamt of the boy who always took the short cut through our street."

Jimmy gave a little smile, studying Thomas' side profile. But Thomas' face fell as his thoughts went back in time and Jimmy placed his hand on Thomas' neck. "You know, there's another reason for Latin too. They have such wonderful phrases of life."

Thomas relaxed, shoulders easing up from Jimmy's soft touch.

"And there are so many great books. Stories so open, without all those damn hypocrites and conservatives."

Thomas closed his eyes, head tilting back into the soft palm that was Jimmy's hand.

"Tell me something will you?" Thomas questioned in a low voice.

Jimmy was dragging his fingers in the hair in Thomas' neck, and it brought tears to Thomas' eyes, for no one had ever done such a delicate gesture, and even though he really wanted to open his eyes he was afraid they'd pool over.

"Amor vincit omnia," Jimmy whispered, "ac, amor caecus est."

"You sound extraordinary when you speak like that."

"You don't even know what I'm saying."

"Indulge me then."

Thomas could feel Jimmy shifting and the hand was removed from his neck, leaving him battling a shiver. Thomas opened his eyes staring right into a pair of ocean blue. They were smiling, and then Jimmy took off, running to the back door and grinning back at Thomas. Thomas remained seated long enough to light another cigarette before having to get back to work, smiling to himself, and not a single thought of bitterness behind it.

* * *

As Thomas entered the kitchen at seven after dressing Mr Crawley for dinner, he was met by a scene of uneasiness.

"James, I expect you don't want me to go back on my pleasant behaviour. Now go do as you've been told, I won't ever see you dressed anything less than decent again."

"No Mr Carson."

Thomas stopped in the doorway to take in the scene. Jimmy stood with his head bent and hurried past Thomas and upstairs. Carson shook his head before giving the rest of the orders concerning the dinner. "Now, Alfred you take the sauce."

Alfred looked like as if he wanted to protest but upon seeing Carson's face he thought better of it. Carson turned and noticed Thomas for the first time. "Mr Barrow if you would be so kind to serve the pork today. Our second footman is apparently not up for the task this evening."

Thomas only bowed his head, but noticed the smirk on O'Brien's face as he went to grab the plate Daisy presented him.

"I wonder how he managed to loose a button already, he seems too ungraceful for a footman to be," she chimed in as she did the final touch to the plate.

"Think nothin' of it it will ya, is not your concern," Thomas batted in and left her a stern glance before heading upstairs.

In the dining room the conversations went smoothly until the food arrived. "Carson, why is Barrow serving tonight?" The Lord asked puzzled, eyeing Thomas in his suit.

"A minor problem only, my Lord. Hopefully it'll just be this once."

"Very well then," The Lord cleared his throat and Lady Grantham smiled at her husband. "Robert, stop making a fuzz and tell us all about the plans for the trip."

The Lord took a sip of his wine. "Oh yes, that reminds me, if you could come wake me at seven tomorrow morning Barrow. Molesley is gone for the weekend and I need to go over something. I'm sure Matthew will be happy dressing himself for once. He couldn't stop going on about it when he came here."

The Lord sent Mr Crawley a glance and a smile, and Mr Crawley laughed. "I can definitely manage a day without a valet, Robert. It'll be a nice reminder for me not to get over my head."

"I hope you're not implying something my way, Matthew." Lady Grantham gave the Lord another glance.

"So what plans do you have in London, Mary?" Old Lady Grantham squeezed into the conversation without seeming like a topic breaker, as only she could.

Carson came up to Thomas as he was on his way out of the dining room again to refill the plate. "Check on James later will you? I'm not sure he can handle sewing when he can't handle to look presentable," Carson's words were strict and with a hint of annoyance. He hated when anything was out of order.

"I will Mr Carson."

Thomas already knew O'Brien was out to make trouble for him but it was not right to do it through Jimmy.

As dinner was done upstairs and the family was well seated with drinks in the drawing room, Thomas climbed the stairs to the boys hall. Thomas knocked on Jimmy's door once before entering. Jimmy sat on his bed with his head in his hands but looked up when Thomas entered.

"I don't understand, the jacket was perfectly fine when I made it ready this morning-"

"One word, O'Brien."

Jimmy furrowed his brows. "But why-"

"She doesn't need a reason to do evilness." Thomas hadn't told Jimmy about his and O'Brien's previous acquaintanceship, and how they were at each other's throat at the moment which was likely her motif more than anything else. Thomas walked over to the chair where Jimmy had abandoned the uniform and inspected the black jacket where the button was missing. "I'll help you sew it tomorrow when the family has left."

Jimmy sighed but gave a tiny smile, laying back on the bed. "I'm probably not gonna get a half day on Saturday after this," he mumbled.

Thomas took a seat at the desk chair facing him. "Just volunteer to clean some extra silver tomorrow and you're good." Thomas had to resist the urge to comfort him more, afraid he couldn't stop himself if he came any closer. Jimmy was still in the white shirt and front, and Thomas got awfully curious. "You haven't worn such uniforms before have you?"

Jimmy shook his head. "Nicest thing I had was a navy blue shirt before the Lord gave me a grey suit when I came here. I don't even know how to do a tie. I mean, I don't even know why I'm here. I wonder what the Duke lied about in the reference for him to think me suited for a place like Downton."

"Everything can be learned. I think the Lord wanted to give you a shot. Maybe prove that no one's a lost case. Don't remember you did excellent on your first serving. The details will come in time."

Jimmy eyed Thomas then, more hopeful. "What did you do before Downton?"

Thomas shrugged, avoiding Jimmy's curious gaze. "Did a few jobs as a servant in restaurants but that was all."

Jimmy sat back up and eyed the clock on his night stand. "I'm not sure I want to be in the presence of Carson yet."

Thomas stood up as to give his words greater impact. "No, but that's exactly what you must. Don't let this be a big deal. Never show him weakness. When you do wrong you apologize and continue on. That's lesson number two." Jimmy nodded his head as if pondering on it for a moment.

"So get dressed in your day clothes and come downstairs." Thomas gave him an encouraging tight smile before leaving the room and biting down on his button lip to keep from turning around in the door and meet Jimmy's eyes.

* * *

Dinner downstairs was unusually quiet before Carson informed everyone about the importance of keeping up the working moral even when the family was absent. He went through the tasks for the coming day before he was occupied with conversing with Mrs Hughes. Alfred whispered something about Ivy to Jimmy whenever Daisy wasn't in the room, serving. The maids were trying to keep it light as Anna was still struggling with Bates being in the prison at present.

When the table was cleared, Jimmy was in a good mood again and doing card tricks on Alfred , and Thomas stepped outside for a last blow for the night.

"He fancies you, I can tell," came a familiar voice behind him after his first inhale. "Was following you with his gaze as you left."

Thomas had to close his eyes before snapping in reply. "Stay out of it. And if you know what's best for ya, you leave him alone."

"You're quite protective of him, I wonder what you're hiding."

Thomas hurried to finish his smoke before pushing past an amused O'Brien and back inside.

The girls and the footmen were caught up in the card games now, laughing and cheering at the next victim for Jimmy's lurking ways.

Thomas finished his duties with Mr Crawley for the night, packing up his suitcase for the trip before bidding him goodnight. When he finally entered his room for the night he was a bit taken back from finding Jimmy there already. He wanted to scowl him for being in his room without Thomas' permission but was halted when he found the younger man wincing and with blood covering the back of his under shirt.

"Christ, Jimmy you'll need proper stitches. I'll need to wake Mrs Hughes-"

"No don't," Jimmy said with panic etching his voice. "They think I just hit myself a little on the door frame, no one will believe it if they see the cut."

Thomas dragged a hand through his hair before fetching warm water and towels, and his medical bag in the closet. "Good thing I still keep this around. Take off your shirt carefully and take a seat at my desk."

Thomas cleaned away the blood and prepared a sterile needle. "Here, bite onto the clot, it'll hurt like hell. I'll try to be quick about it but I've only done this twice so I can't promise anything. Lucky for you I think three stitches will be enough. The first one I did needed seven, the other eleven."

Jimmy took a few deep breaths before nodding his head. "Okay, I'm ready. I'm sure it wont be much worse that the thing that got me this in the first place."

This halted Thomas for a moment but he recovered again when Jimmy bit down on the cloth, head bent over the desk and hands tense against the hard wood. The first stitch was the worst, Thomas had to pull the needle through twice, and Jimmy made a hissing sound into the cloth.

"Try to think of something else, distract yourself," Thomas tried, and he himself had to keep from losing his concentration to the defined back muscles tensing on Jimmy's back. Jimmy grabbed a pen and a blank piece of paper as Thomas started on the second stitch.

When he was done he covered the cut again and found more painkillers for Jimmy to take before he went to bed. He lent him one of his own under shirts before sending him off.

"Thank you again, I guess," Jimmy spoke, hand on the door handle.

"You'll have to see a doctor about it next week, there's only so much damage control I can manage." Jimmy's eyes widened but Thomas was quick to add, "We'll tell them you need a regular health check. The Lord will agree I'm sure. Don't worry about it."

Jimmy smiled then but Thomas could still see he was in pain.

"Take the pills," he ordered and Jimmy left the room but peeked inside before closing the door. "On your desk. Goodnight."

Thomas stared at the door an extra couple of seconds before going over to his desk. On the crippled paper next to the bloody discarded shirt, there were two separate lines written with utter preciseness and a perfectly managed elegance.

_Love conquers all. Love is blind_.

That night Thomas dreamt of a boy with the softest lips and a beaten body. But his eyes held hope.

* * *

Author's note: Once again thank you all for reading and leaving encouraging words. I didn't really know where to go with this when I started it but the response has gotten me interested in continuing. I hope you'll leaving me anything, critisismn or cheers, it's all very appreciated. Again more Latin but it's gotten a key in the story now and I've also revealed its origin. More subtle hints and if you do pick up on them feel free to try me - so far I've had one response who's figured out a huge underlying fact. That's all. Until next time dear readers. Now be a good sport and leave me a review, I'll make sure to reply to everyone.


	5. Chapter 3 - Part 1

**Clouds**

~ A Downton Abbey series

_Author: _TopOfChaplin

_Pairing: _Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent

_Other characters: _Lord Grantham, Lady Grantham, Mary, Edith, Sybil, Tom Branson, Matthew Crawley, Mrs. Crawley, Violet, Mrs. Patmore, Ms. O'Brien, Mrs. Hughes, Mr. Carson, Daisy, Ivy, Alfred

_Genres:_ Angst, Romance, Drama

_Rating:_ M

_Summary:_ A young man comes along who's had a rough past. Thomas is given orders to keep an extra eye on him by the Lord himself. But Thomas is damaged too, and what no one knows is that what they need is not acceptable. Not in 1920, and Downton Abbey is no exception. But the sky is quickly changing, and everyone will feel it as the clouds roll in. A dangerous change casting its shadows over the abbey.

_Acknowledgements: _I do not own any of the characters, and all events are purely fictional. The story does not follow the series correctly at all times, and some circumstances are changed.

* * *

Nimbostratus - Part 1

_~ A Nimbostratus cloud is characterized by a formless cloud layer that is almost uniformly **dark** grey. It will occur along warm fronts and it's usually a sign of steady moderate to **heavy** precipitation ~_

The family had driven away to the train station, just in the nick of time as the weather was bad and the ride would take longer on the wet grounds. Thankfully the Lord hadn't asked Thomas to fill him in on Jimmy that morning, for Thomas had woken to a change this morning. Obviously he'd been attracted to Jimmy since he'd seen his dark form in the night, and quite the more when he knew that he had something in common with him. But Thomas was still uncertain as to Jimmy's nature of things. After all he had been forced to live in the lifestyle that himself and the Duke occupied. Now that he was free Thomas was his glue, his confidence and support. And Thomas had been set on that, shoving away his own feelings for the sake of looking out for Jimmy. Yet as he rose from his vivid dreams in the early hour, Jimmy's face and lips were still all Thomas could think about.

And Jimmy's note that lay dangerously on his night table.

He'd read the few words over and over until he couldn't postpone the duties awaiting. And now he felt different.

But he hadn't yet gotten as far as to pondering on whether it was the dream or the ink written words. Jimmy was different too, and maybe it was the pain in his back or knowing he had to visit the doctor about it, or maybe just the events of yesterday's unsuccessful dinner serving on his part. As Jimmy was new and packing the car was a hastening business on this particular travel, it'd been the perfect excuse for Thomas to step into the footman role once again, deliberately saving Jimmy the lifting in concern of his back.

"You sure you don't miss being a footman Mr Barrow? I expect when Mr Bates returns-"

"If Mr Bates returns. No one knows that yet."

Carson narrowed his already small eyes, his dark thick brows knitting together. "I won't have such nonsense, his Lordship will pull all the strings he can and so will the staff at Downton. I was merely asking since you seem to willingly step back in on the duties. Is there something you're not telling me?"

Thomas stood composed as ever, letting Carson know not to mistake an honest helping hand or two. "I'm being considerate and flexible Mr Carson, like we all must from time to time. I cannot see reason to complain."

Mr Carson cleared his throat. "Well then I suppose you can get on with your assigned tasks for the day."

Thomas bowed his head as he hurried back inside, eager for being hands full on work for the day for a distraction to the spinning madness in his mind. He started going over his Lordship's clothes, checking them over and folding them. Hang up the bow ties in a colour scheme and order of event. Moving so on to the Earl's collection and general cleaning of belongings. He dusted the hats and polished the two dozen of shoes. Then he moved on to Mr Crawley's dressing room, repeating the duties. It was nearly luncheon by the time he was done, and he seized the opportunity to start refastening the button to Jimmy's jacket.

Outside in the back of course.

He couldn't stand being in the servants hall with the footmen cleaning all the silver, whining whenever Mr Carson wasn't within hearing. Luckily O'Brien had accompanied Lady Grantham and was completely absent from the building. He was certain to be left in peace with his cigarette stuck between his lips and needle and thread in his hands. Because of the steady drizzle he had to keep in the shelter of the garage though, but he didn't mind the rattling in there anyhow. He'd never been interested in cars or mechanics, but he'd had no choice but to learn the way of clocks. It was when he'd confessed he wouldn't be staying to take over the business that his father had lashed out on him.

When his father had seen him kissing the Scottish lad working in the newspaper stable a few months later, he'd run away after his father had beaten him to bloods and two broken ribs. The only contact he'd had with his family since was his younger sister informing him of how they were, but always ending the letters with wanting no reply if he was still screwed up. Thomas had never been and would never be, but he knew what his sister meant and had never replied. He'd been shocked when in the last letter he'd been told to give word if he was alive and well. He didn't spend too much time thinking of it though, he'd stopped caring about them a long time ago.

And now there was Jimmy, who quickened his pulse and made his chest ache. Thomas had stopped thinking of love more or less. He had almost accepted life without it, turning to bitterness and troublemaking to be a constant distraction, only aching for it at desperate times. Like when he thought he might be dying in the grafts of mud. He'd lost track of time and had forgotten his pocket watch, but the button was almost fastened when he heard light and fast footsteps approaching him where he sat in the door opening to the garage, isolated from the worst thick smell of oil and rust and at the same time keeping out of the downpour.

"Ay Mr Barrow I was said to let you know to come inside for lunch. Everyone is eating together even me and the outside staff," said the hall boy Thomas hadn't cared to remember the name of. Thomas didn't look up from his handy work but blew him off. "I'll come when I come, off you go."

"But Mr Barrow, Mr Carson wanted-"

"I said I'll come when I come, now leave me to it."

The hall boy went silent then, only his quick breathing giving away that he was still there, before the rattle off the ground told Thomas he was running on.

"Bloody hell," Thomas cursed a moment later when he managed to draw the tip of the needle into his index finger and loosening the thread again. Lightening his smoke that had stopped glowing between his teeth, before doing the final stitches over. Thomas wasn't in the mood to socialize and he was definitely not hungry. His mind had been occupied all morning, and he knew he needed to know whatever the letter in the Lord's drawer said. He also needed to write a reply to his sister if he was going into town the next day, so he could post it.

"Whatever are you sitting out here for? Thought you'd been fetched for the meal but you never showed up. Carson was not happy with your absence," came a familiar voice beside Thomas a while later, and he was startled for a second not having heard anyone arriving.

"Well Carson isn't in my power to please whatever I seem to do."

"You're not the only one. He found Alfred and me dazing off in our chairs polishing the silver earlier, and my did we get a banter. Oh, you've fixed my jacket," Jimmy stated astounded, and Thomas did the failure of looking up at him. Jimmy's hair and coat was wet from the rain, eyes light and smiling, and with a broad grin plastered.

Thomas had to swallow and clear his throat before he could reply. "Said I'd do it didn't I? First and last time Jimmy."

Jimmy accepted the black serving jacket when Thomas handed it over, but remained before him, studying the valet. Thomas gathered up the sewing equipment and finished his smoke, and when he'd closed the garage door behind him Jimmy still stood there watching him, just in shelter of the descending water, jacket draped over his forearm. A few droplets had made their way from his hair to the side of his face, and so quickly without thinking, Thomas had taken the few steps over to him and brushed them away.

"I looked up clouds this morning," Jimmy said breathlessly. "And I made you an overview of all the different types."

"Really."

A pausing breath between them.

"I saw your unicorn drawings last night. Those tucked to the side of your desk."

Thomas looked away, a small smile fighting it's way onto his face.

"They're brilliant."

"It's too bad they don't exist."

Jimmy grabbed the hand with the glove, turning it palm up, and Thomas' head turned to look at Jimmy again at the gesture.

"I believe they do. I choose to believe they do. People might think me crazy, but why should I care what over people think."

"Certain people can ruin your life if you step out of line Jimmy," Thomas broke in, but his voice was shaking. Jimmy's touch was so soft, too soft.

"Oh but it would be an adventure. Exciting."

"Dangerous."

"Magical."

Thomas felt light weighted and cramped. He couldn't, he needed to know what was in the letter. He needed to know what the Lord was hiding.

Was Jimmy a test? Set up to break him? To get him fired perhaps?

Thomas didn't know but he knew he'd never wanted anyone as he wanted Jimmy. Had never cared for anyone the way he did for him, and he'd barely known him a week. Jimmy's hands were moving dangerously onto Thomas' waist, trailing down to his front, and Thomas felt his heart shattering for the poor boy.

Grabbing Jimmy's hands in a firm grip, he stepped away and turned to pick up the abandoned box of needles and thread.

"You think getting in my pants will please me. You think you know love," Thomas hissed the words in the face of a Jimmy with big shocked eyes and gushed hair. "Has this evil world taught you nothing yet? Tell me, who else have you gone seducing? The Duke's affairs too? Maybe his staff? Did you kiss his hand, begging him to love you? Did you really think the world outside would want you too?"

Tears slid down Jimmy's cheeks, and Thomas couldn't bear to look at him any more.

"I always hung on to the thought that he would love me one day, if I pleased him long enough. If I did everything he said," Jimmy spoke, voice breaking.

Thomas was at the point of furious, not really at Jimmy, but at the Duke and society for its narrow-minded ways. For people with money and status to sit with power to ruin the working class to the brick of nothing. He had stepped onto the lawn now and the rain soaked him, hair coming loose on his forehead.

"Love isn't blind to everyone Jimmy. It is full of prejudices and betrayal. Consequences and troubles. And pain." Thomas dared glancing in Jimmy's direction but regretted it a second too late, frowning and looking down to be able to say his next words. "You need to learn how to live being unhappy, unfulfilled. For there is no room for people like us out here in the real world. Only locked away behind doors in dark places, silent for no one dares to speak, and punished for no one knows how to deal with it." Thomas spat out the last words, but managed to keep his voice down. Then he turned around and marched back to the house, fumbling with one hand in the inside of his jacket for a much needed cigarette to drown away some of the pressure in his chest.

He faintly heard Jimmy's low voice behind him, mumbling words or sentences, Thomas couldn't tell. It was Latin. But Thomas knew he'd brought Jimmy back to the edge of desperation, for he was taking solace in his only shield as he'd done around the Duke. Thomas wanted nothing more than to turn around and run back to him, take him in his arms and tell him to believe in love. To kiss him and show him how wonderful it could be. But Jimmy had never been kissed, how would he know how to feel. He'd never been loved only used, how would he know the difference. And Thomas didn't dare to believe in love.

* * *

Dinner was uneventful and quiet for the most part.

Mrs Patmore was excited for they were trying her Christmas turkey, and Mrs Hughes was happy they were having dessert for once. The footmen were still mildly beat down from the events earlier in the day and still sucking up for the extra work. Alfred especially was in a foul mood knowing he wouldn't have his Saturday off. Thomas avoided Carson's scolding gaze and diverted his attention to his plate for the entirety of the meal.

When Carson rose from the table at last, and everyone with him, he spoke to Thomas. "Since you were absent earlier Mr Barrow, I suggest you take Isis for her evening walk. The rest of you are dismissed for the night. Now excuse me, I have unfinished duties waiting in the office."

When Carson had left the room, "Can't believe that creature is still alive," Thomas muttered under his breath, and Mrs Hughes gave him a warning glance. "She's made it through almost two decades and a war. You ought to show her some decency and courtesy Mr Barrow. Now off you go if you're finished inspecting your empty plate."

Thomas threw his napkin and stepped away from the table when Jimmy halted up.

"I'll go with you Mr Barrow."

"Why, out in that awful storm?" Alfred burst out.

Jimmy turned to look at him. "You forget I used to work outside in any weather and learned to like it all," Jimmy said pointedly.

Thomas could see Mrs Hughes watching him and left the room to find the dog.

"Whatever suits you," Alfred muttered, before turning his attention back to his dessert pie. Out in the hall Thomas was whistling for the dog and Jimmy followed him to the empty upstairs.

"Can I come?" Jimmy asked at last as Thomas was finding the leech.

"Seeing as you've already invited yourself I think it's a tad bit late to ask." Jimmy didn't reply and Thomas sighted, turning to face him. "Go fetch our coats and meet me out front."

Jimmy did as he was asked and met Thomas and Isis waiting just outside the main entrance. "It's not raining anymore," Jimmy noted as he handed the coat over.

"No, but the wind is blowing and no stars are visible. It's darker to the west, raining a few miles from here. It'll start again soon," Thomas explained nonchalantly, absently finding a smoke before petting Isis. "Come on girl, lets enter those woods we love so much shall we?" Thomas said, voice lighter than Jimmy could ever remember hearing it. Thomas took off down the fine path from the abbey and Jimmy buttoned his coat and hurried after.

They walked side by side, Isis tapping in front of them, but even she was wary as the trees squeaked and rustled in the heavy breeze. Jimmy had to hold on to his cap now and then to prevent it from being taken by the strong wind. There was still tension between the two men from earlier that day that none of them addressed to.

The first rain drops fell when they were at the outskirts of the woods again. When Thomas halted as Isis became interested in something on the ground, Jimmy seized Thomas' upper arm.

"I..." Jimmy's eyes were wide, fear evident in them, and Thomas was taken back. Thomas was about to retreat from the grip when Jimmy, desperate, put his other hand up to hold on to the same arm of Thomas'. "My mind still takes me back to that house some nights. When I close the door behind me I still picture him slowly unlocking my door and stepping inside. With that sickening smile plastered on his face. He loved to mark me. He had a small knife and he would have me moaning for him to slice my skin. Tie me up and watch me bleed while he did me."

Thomas stood frozen in place as Jimmy spoke like a waterfall finally falling. "He...he would tape my mouth too, so that I couldn't press my lips to his skin. And sometimes it felt like I couldn't breathe." Thomas had to look away, Jimmy's words and face piercing him like a stab in his chest.

"Some time he would leave me tied for hours, like he'd forgotten me. Like he was leaving me to bleed out, to die." Jimmy was shaking Thomas' arm now. "Thomas, Thomas look at me. Look at me," Jimmy cried over the wind. He didn't care that his cap was now lying in the mud at his feet, or that the rain hit his face, the cold dampness stinging his exposed skin. Thomas turned his head back to look at Jimmy, his face screwed up in pain at Jimmy's confession.

"I was planning on killing him Thomas. I was making preparations for when he would return. And then the Lord showed up." Tears were blurring Jimmy's sight now, and he was shaking so bad he thought he might loose footing had he not held on to Thomas' strong arm. "I couldn't take any more. I wanted to kill myself too, maybe drug myself. I knew where he hid his daily doze of sleeping pills, they were strong, and I would take them with booze and place myself in the bathtub-"

"Stop," Thomas said in a strangled voice, breaking free from Jimmy's grip. Isis' leech was no longer in Thomas' hand, but Isis hadn't gone anywhere and was silently watching the exchange before her. Thomas turned to the nearest tree branch and punched it with his whole arm, taking deep breaths. When he faced Jimmy again the younger man was slowly sinking together, and in half a second Thomas was there catching him.

Sobs wrecked through Jimmy as Thomas pulled him close, supporting his weight as he hugged him.

"No one ever cared. Dad went away without goodbye. Mother knew what she sent me to. And no one ever cared," Jimmy got out between shaky breaths and heavy sobs.

"I care Jimmy. Dammit, I fuckin' care," Thomas finally confessed to him, pressing Jimmy's head to his neck, sheltering him from the wind.

They stood there embracing until Isis had lost her patience and gave a small whine, as if almost afraid to interrupt. Jimmy laughed then and Thomas moved Jimmy to arms length, studying him with concern. His eyes were wet, lips moist and red, and Thomas was panicking. "If you ever think about...please give me that pocket knife you have on your night stand."

Jimmy shook his head. "I need that, it's my sanctuary."

But Thomas wouldn't give up. "Come to me. When it gets too much, you find me. I'll be your pocket knife, I'll be your protection."

Jimmy nodded slowly at last. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay."

"Good, now, can you stand?" Thomas was still gripping Jimmy's overarms, afraid that if he let go his feet would disappear beneath him. As if confused Jimmy looked down on his feet, moving them. When his gaze averted up he saw Thomas' outstretched hand as he'd let go of him

"Take my hand."

Jimmy did, and Thomas' hand was cold and strong, yet still slightly warmer than his own. Thomas bent to grab Isis' leech before leading them in the direction of the woods again. Jimmy side glanced at Thomas but didn't say anything, focusing on the feel of his hand on his own and breathing normally. Isis didn't seem to mind another round either. By the time they were heading back to the house Jimmy felt lighter.

"Oh, my cap," Jimmy muttered, casting a glance backwards. Thomas let go of his hand to fire another cigarette, and pulled something else out of his outer pocket. Jimmy accepted the balled dirty cap with a small smile, staring up and into Thomas' eyes in the dim light from the abbey. The rain was still coming down and they were both soaked.

"I'll come by to your room later," Thomas said in a soft voice, but his face was hard. Jimmy knew he was afraid, knew he was risking, and he was afraid too. He needed to be staying at Downton, he had nowhere else to go. Swallowing hard Jimmy broke their gaze.

"Please knock. He didn't...he-"

"I will knock Jimmy. He won't ever come here again you know." Jimmy took a last deep inhale of the fresh air, closing his eyes and nodding.

Thomas lingered a moment, watching the younger man before him. In the dim light, shadows were thrown over his delicate frame. As Jimmy's eyes stayed close Thomas' hand reached out as to cup his chin, but he bit his lip, face twisted in agony as he let it fall again. Thomas had never been strong, not really. He'd been scared, afraid, a coward and weak but never strong. Now he had to be strong for Jimmy. And he could too, cause for the first time in his life he honestly cared for someone other than himself.

"I'll be there at ten, and three knocks."

Then Thomas gave a small whistle at Isis who eagerly followed him inside. Jimmy opened his eyes slowly, watching Thomas as he disappeared inside the front door, before levelling his head to the sky, enjoying the splattering water from above.

And for a moment the sky was weeping with him and he could scream into the night, flail out his arms, for no one could deny him that freedom.

* * *

**Author's note:** The storm hits its first targets. Now you know more details about how scarred Jimmy really is, and why Thomas is so hesitant around him, despite the obvious attration. Thomas is also troubled from other corners, and you got to know a bit of his past in this chapter as well. As always thank you for reading, and I would very much like reviews. More feedback means faster updates, as my wiriting eager boosts. That was it, I'd love to know what you all thought of this. Aaand, checkin' out.


	6. Chapter 3 - Part 2

**Clouds**

~ A Downton Abbey series

_Author: _TopOfChaplin

_Pairing: _Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent

_Other characters: _Lord Grantham, Lady Grantham, Mary, Edith, Sybil, Tom Branson, Matthew Crawley, Mrs. Crawley, Violet, Mrs. Patmore, Ms. O'Brien, Mrs. Hughes, Mr. Carson, Daisy, Ivy, Alfred

_Genres:_ Angst, Romance, Drama

_Rating:_ M

_Summary:_ A young man comes along who's had a rough past. Thomas is given orders to keep an extra eye on him by the Lord himself. But Thomas is damaged too, and what no one knows is that what they need is not acceptable. Not in 1920, and Downton Abbey is no exception. But the sky is quickly changing, and everyone will feel it as the clouds roll in. A dangerous change casting its shadows over the abbey.

_Acknowledgements: _I do not own any of the characters, and all events are purely fictional. The story does not follow the series correctly at all times, and some circumstances are changed.

* * *

Nimbostratus - part 2

_~ Nimbostratus virga are clouds where the rain evaporates before it hits the ground. It's often shown as a streak or shaft on the basin of the cloud. The Virga can produce **dramatic** and **beautiful** scenes in the sunset, where the red light can hit the streamers of **falling** precipitation ~_

Thomas had written to his sister.

He'd been short, dismissive and cold, which came naturally. Just as naturally as his protectiveness towards Jimmy.

The prior night after Jimmy's breakdown Thomas had knocked on his door as he said he would, before letting himself into the room of the footman. Jimmy had looked him in the eyes as he'd placed the red shafted pocket knife in Thomas' open palm, and Thomas could see his blaring confidence, or maybe just utter lack of shyness. But Thomas expected that much, for god knows had he been confronted to anything but delicate matters.

Jimmy was hesitant at other things though, for he had not ever had anyone look out for him. Neither had Thomas really, but at least Thomas had always been the commander of his own mind and body, and he had landed a good job quite young. After breaking Thomas' gaze he had let his eyes sweep elsewhere as he'd asked in a small voice if he maybe could have one of Thomas' drawings. Thomas, confused, hadn't replied at first and Jimmy had raised hopeful eyes to look at him.

"I'd feel safer if I had something strong and independent to look at. Unicorns are that, and so much more," he'd explained to Thomas in a soft voice.

Thomas nodded at last, giving him the tiniest of smiles, which was Thomas' most genuine one. He hadn't expected the bone crushing hug mere seconds later, but he'd hugged back, breathing in the closeness of Jimmy.

"You know, unicorn is a word from Latin right?" Jimmy had said as he retreated and sat down on his bed. Thomas had shook his head, amused, before bringing him the drawing he'd done a few years back one night when the moon had shone through his window and thrown shadows on his walls. A stallion unicorn with a lion's tale, front feet off the ground and head levelled to the open sky.

It was Thomas' best drawing by his own opinion, and for that thought he seemed it fitting for Jimmy. And so the night stand by Jimmy's bed where the knife used to rest, there now stood a unicorn drawing. Thomas also noticed that Jimmy had finally opened the curtain by his window, if only half way.

* * *

It was Saturday mid morning and everyone was bustling around, Carson shooting orders in the corridors and hallways. The family would be returning tomorrow afternoon and they would have additional guests with them from London. Mrs Patmore needed indeed some ingredients for the upcoming meal and had pursued Carson to let Jimmy go after Thomas' suggestion. But then again Carson couldn't really forbid Jimmy for he had only a half day today. Thomas pointed this out to Carson, and didn't forget to mention that Jimmy was in fact doing extra work this way. Carson grunted and agreed pointing out that whatever they did on their free afternoon and night was the same for him, but they did well to be bright and ready tomorrow morning.

"Jimmy, we're leaving then," Thomas informed the footman who was still occupied in the hall, putting on his hat and giving a nick with his head in the direction of the door. Jimmy left the polishing to Alfred and hurriedly followed.

Once they were across the lawn and well on their way to town, Thomas suddenly skipped off the road and towards the icy woods and Jimmy stopped behind him.

"Where are you going?" He questioned as Thomas began walking in between the trees.

"Just another route, it'll lead us where were going, don't worry," Thomas replied as he turned and raised his brows at Jimmy who still stood in the road. Shaking his head, Jimmy came up to Thomas, pushing sticks out if his way.

"Is it a short cut?" Jimmy continued to ask. Thomas smiled then, shoving away more bushes to let them further into the thickness of trees.

"I would say it's rather a longer cut."

Jimmy huffed then. "And what's the point in that?"

"There's no point. Everything doesn't have a point."

Jimmy crossed his arms over his chest, bending to avoid a larger branch as he tumbled after Thomas' quick and familiar stepping. Sighting, Jimmy continued to struggle through the hinders of the woods, soon enough falling too far behind to see or hear Thomas.

"Well isn't this brilliant," Jimmy mumbled under his breath, looking around and trying to decipher which direction to go. "Thomas," Jimmy tried, but barely louder than normal voice. "Thomas," this time louder. Then, too quickly for Jimmy to even register it before it happened, Thomas was behind him, taking hold of his arm. Jimmy sucked in a breath as Thomas startled him, but willingly followed with Thomas' hand resting at his lower back. With a quick glance to Thomas' face he nearly crashed into a tree but Thomas steered him clear.

"Gotta teach you how to walk too," Thomas mumbled as Jimmy stumbled, but his tone was anything but annoyed.

"Maybe I need to teach you what places are for strolling and what's for nature to grow on," Jimmy threw back with a cheeky smirk, and warmth flowed his veins as Thomas' steady hand was guiding him, and his body touching Jimmy several places as they walked side by side.

"Why but this is more fun," Thomas replied, pressing Jimmy closer to avoid another tree. Jimmy wasn't sure he agreed, but then again he couldn't think straight for several reasons at the moment. Mostly because when he glided his right hand down Thomas' arm to grab his hand, Thomas laced his fingers with his own without the slightest hesitance.

* * *

Thomas had been at the post office and _Henry McGill's Superior Footwear_ twice in the time it took Jimmy to pick up the order of beans and roasted nuts for Mrs Patmore. Then they went together to the doctors office to get an appointment for Jimmy. That hadn't been the plan but Thomas insisted they fix it since they were in town anyway, and Jimmy already knew Thomas wasn't easily dismissed of whatever he'd planned.

The doctor, a colleague of the family friend and Dr. Clarkson, had just had an appointment rescheduled for the afternoon and offered to take on Jimmy at once. Jimmy just shrugged and Thomas eyed him before addressing the doctor.

"That would be most convenient doctor. I stitched him up myself having been a medic in the army, but my handiwork is rather rusty."

"Come on in then and I'll see what I can do."

The doctor redid the rough stitches and even though Jimmy was offered anaesthetics, he kindly declined, yet he hung his head low while the doctor proceeded. Thomas sat in a nearby chair and observed Jimmy's face more than the work being done on his back, which was his excuse to be in the room. As the unnamed doctor was finished Thomas told him to send the bill to the Earl of Downton which served him a confused look from Jimmy. Thomas merely glanced at him, preventing Jimmy to question it out loud.

Out on the street again Thomas put up a deal at the hostel for them to leave the orders for picking up later before locating them to his favourite pub for a meal. "Never had a proper meal in a pub before. Not drinks either," Jimmy stated, grinning like a child as he took in the relaxed and cheerful atmosphere in the pub a Saturday afternoon.

A few locals were already long way down their mugs while others had just gotten started. The pub was more or less half full and it wasn't even six o'clock.

"Just wait till seven, the live music goes on then. A real party."

Thomas and Jimmy found an unoccupied table in the very back and took their seats. "So you go here often then? In your free time?" Jimmy asked, still letting his eyes sweep over people and their surroundings. Thomas chuckled, shrugging out of his jacket and placing his hat on the table side.

"Don't have much time off," Thomas answered, leaning his forearms on the table, looking directly at Jimmy. For a moment Jimmy was lost taking in the delicate details that was Thomas' face, noting how Thomas seemed to constantly wear a small frown, his eyebrows loosely knitted.

"What do you want?" Thomas asks slowly, and Jimmy's eyes flickered to his red mouth as it moved to form the words. That gave him a light kick in the calf of his left foot and Thomas's brows furrowed deeper. "What would you like to eat," he asked again and Jimmy sat up straighter, dismissing his own jacket.

"I'll have whatever you're having. I don't really know much about what's good in pubs."

Thomas went ahead and ordered and together they ate fried fish and potatoes and drank each a pint of beer. They didn't talk much during the meal, and as the music got started Jimmy was very much preoccupied with nodding his head to the rhythm and watch more or less drunken dancers file the floor. "It's brilliant," Jimmy grinned, eyes still swimming everywhere, only stopping to meet Thomas' now and then. Thomas held his gaze constantly on Jimmy, unable to keep a smile off his own face at the way Jimmy seemed to enjoy himself.

For Thomas small things were getting a whole new meaning, seeing what they could do to someone who'd had so little of joys to be young. Another half litre and Jimmy would have danced on the table himself if Thomas hadn't dragged him outside and hauled him for a walk just on the outskirts the busy streets. Thomas was a bit tipsy himself, but opposed to Jimmy who'd also had three shots of whiskey, he'd been so before and it would take a couple of more units for him to be stumbling on his feet.

"Mr Barrow you said you were a good dancer, I think you should show me," Jimmy said, small giggling sounds erupting afterwards as he leaned on Thomas' side for support. Taking another turn, Thomas saw they were near an empty park and lead way for them through the half open gate.

"I only dance to tunes," Thomas answered, closing the gate behind them and walking all the way to the middle of the seemingly symmetrical green spot.

"Oh but I hear tunes," Jimmy drawled, arms flailing around him as he spun. "Listen to the noises of the distant cars, footsteps on the concrete, dogs barking somewhere. Surely you can dance to the tune of a little city life," he finished with another laugh, taking hold of each of Thomas' coat arms. Thomas was constantly watching his face that seemed proper youthful for the first time since he'd met him.

"Very well then we shall dance. One, for I seemingly cannot deny you anything, and two, because I think you might not remember all too much of these events when you wake up tomorrow."

"I will certainly remember you dancing with me, Thomas. And if I don't you will surely have to bid me up again."

Thomas couldn't deny that he would, for Jimmy moved so swiftly and softly in his arms even a bit intoxicated that he was. Thomas held a steady hand at his waist while the other was clasped with his, and he lead them in a circle around the frozen fountain in the medium dark evening. Jimmy's head was bent upwards, eyes closed and a smile constantly in place. Thomas was all too aware of the beauty before him, his eyes finding difficulty watching where he placed his steps as he drank in the younger man whose unkissed lips were dangerously close. Gradually Thomas stopped spinning them and was only lightly tipping them from side to side, holding Jimmy even closer, most of their upper bodies pressed together.

"Tell me something," Jimmy spoke, mouth still turned upwards but seemingly more sober already, Thomas noted. Thomas kept his arms at Jimmy's waist, as he waited for a further explanation to Jimmy's words. When Thomas made no move to reply Jimmy lazily opened his blue eyes, squinting up at Thomas. "Tell me what you'd do if you could do anything without anyone having a problem with it."

Thomas chuckled into the cold air, dragging his eyes away from Jimmy to manage a coherent answer. "I'd make grimaces at Carson every time he said something. I'd sit down on the plush red chair in the library that appears so soft. I'd jump in his Lordship and her Ladyship's bed, just for fun. I'd make myself butler, of course. Then I would change all the household rules. Beginning with an unlimited access to drink wine."

Jimmy smiled with his teeth now and searched out Thomas' absent eyes until they landed upon his own. Thomas' own goofy smile slowly slipped into a serious mask as his words drifted off.

"I would put my palm on your face in the middle of the servants hall, and I would squeeze your hand visible at the dinner table. Then," Thomas bent his head to let his mouth press to Jimmy's red and cold ear. "Then I would press my lips, just slightly, to the left corner of your mouth. Let them linger to feel your body relax, before I'd go on with my day and you yours. Before we'd meet again to go to bed. Sleep side by side, for that would scare away the nightmares, and that would haunt the evil fairies." Jimmy was slightly trembling from the hot breath of Thomas' mouth and closeness.

"Evil fairies?" Jimmy questioned, and Thomas couldn't help but laugh just a little, for of all he'd said that was what Jimmy had to take him upon.

"Well yes of course. The evil fairies are the ones spreading dust on the man and woman that are to fall in love. But they don't know anything, silly little fairies."

"I suppose they don't indeed," Jimmy concluded himself, slowly letting his cheek come to rest at the base of Thomas' neck. "Do you think you could love me? If you believed in love. Do you think you could love me that way the Duke loved you?" Jimmy spoke with a tiny voice after a while.

"How would I know. I never knew that the Duke really loved me did I. But I think not. For he wasn't really brave enough to love, only hurt."

Jimmy didn't speak again for a while, and Thomas might have thought him falling asleep had he not started drawing patterns on Thomas cotton covered chest with his fingers. "Will I not remember this?"

Thomas stopped Jimmy's fingers, guiding them both over to an old bench that was missing two of its wooden plates. Thomas urged Jimmy to take a seat and sat down beside him, scooting over before placing Jimmy's head in his lap. It was getting late and Thomas knew they had to start on their return soon enough, and it was really all too cold to sit still, but for now he couldn't resist.

"You'll remember. Maybe as a dream, but you will remember."

Jimmy smiled up at Thomas, the light from a nearby light post reflecting off Jimmy's eyes, and Thomas had to slip Jimmy's cap off to draw his fingers though the blond hair. "I'm glad," Jimmy sighed before his eyes fluttered closed and then Thomas replied in a voice that Jimmy would have taught was thicker than usual.

"So am I."

* * *

They were walking the rather short distance back to the abbey by the road this time, but it seemed longer than usual to Thomas, who was supporting a intoxicated Jimmy on one arm and supplies on the other. Yet for Thomas it was pleasant to have that balance of weight to support. Having Jimmy tucked to his side felt too good to not be right.

And when Jimmy giggled into his coat and breathed against his neck that made the hairs in the nape raise, Thomas wouldn't have let him go even if Mr Carson himself had been approaching. It was scary the effect the blonde man had on him, how the frozen organ in his chest was melting and the bitterness became harder to uphold. How bubbling happiness from watching Jimmy made him want to smile, to want to be happy. To want to think he'd come to deserve it, to be allowed it.

It was easier to hold on to the opposite thought though; that Jimmy was the one that was granted peace and joy, and how Thomas would cross any and every boundary to full fill that.

As they reached the grounds of the great abbey, nearly all the lights were off, indicating the late hour and the silence of the absent family.

"Do we have to go in just yet?" Jimmy mumbled, slowly retreating from Thomas' side. With his free hand Thomas found his pocket watch and squinted to see the numbers in the dark. It was eleven thirty and Carson would have already locked the doors for the night, but Thomas knew where the spare key was hidden for late arrives.

"Let me just get the supplies inside."

When Thomas returned he didn't see Jimmy at first and started to panic, wildly looking around the dark grounds, before spotting a shadow laying in the middle of the lawn. "Shit," Thomas cursed under his breath as he ran to Jimmy's side, dropping to the ground beside him and lightly slapping his cheek. "Jimmy," he breathed, shaking him. Jimmy opened his eyes then and smiled.

"I'm making a snow angel," Jimmy explained, smiling up to an anxious Thomas. Breathing out heavily in relief, Thomas rested his hands behind his head before sitting down and stretching out his legs in front of him.

"There isn't any snow," Thomas muttered and glanced up on the black sky.

"Maybe not, but I can always pretend."

After a little while Jimmy spoke again."But it will snow soon, won't it?" When he didn't get a reply he turned to his side and gazed up at Thomas.

"Can't tell."

This had Jimmy sobering and he sat up so he was facing Thomas, stretching his arms behind him to the cold damp grass. Thomas could see Jimmy waiting for an explanation. "Sometimes it rains or snows high up in the atmosphere but it never reaches the ground before it condensates. Like it's not the right time for it to come down."

"Oh." And then silence again, but Jimmy's curiosity wasn't sated yet. "But why?"

Thomas shrugged. "No one knows yet. A trick of nature. Or maybe it plays an important role in the regulation of the whole system. It's a beautiful sight though, maybe the most beautiful thing I've ever seen since-" Thomas stopped himself then, meeting Jimmy's wide eyes before looking up again.

"I hope to see it once then," Jimmy softly replied.

"How are you feeling?"

"Good, I think. The alcohol is wearing off, my head feels clear again."

Thomas smiled and Jimmy did too. "You," Thomas murmured, reaching a hand out to rest at Jimmy's knee.

"What?"

"Since you. You're beautiful. Especially when you smile."

Jimmy shivered then and instinctively Thomas grabbed his hands.

"We can go inside-"

"No I'd like to stay a bit longer please," Jimmy said before he turned so he sat shoulder to shoulder with Thomas. "Thomas?" Jimmy spoke a few minutes later, letting his eyes wander from the great building to Thomas' likewise perfectly structured face. "Do you think I'll ever be okay?"

"Of course you will. You have me."

Jimmy smiled and Thomas met his searching orbs. Thomas hug a hand in his pant pocket for a smoke when something Jimmy did made him forget about the surge and almost change his belief in heaven.

For Jimmy rested his head on Thomas' shoulder and started singing. Thomas could've sworn it was the voice of an angel, and from that moment he made a promise to himself that he would mend his wings. Jimmy was a fallen angel, but he'd fell into Thomas' arms. And together they would learn how to stumble through this life.

And if they were lucky, or if faith was on their side, maybe one day even fly.

* * *

**Author's note:** First a shout out to all my wonderful readers and reviewers. Thank you for encouraging me to get this chapter up. Somehow I had more difficulty with writing than usual, and my life is really messed up right now. Slowly getting things back together though, but exams and entrance exam to medicine is coming up so bear with me. I hope the next update will be up quicker than this one but I make no promises. Feedback is definitely a boost though, so if you lovely readers leave me some words of encouragement or thoughts I might feel up to spend some extra time writing as opposed to studying...without feeling too bad. That's it for now. Be angels and hit that review button.


	7. Chapter 4 - Part 1

**Clouds**

~ A Downton Abbey series

_Author: _TopOfChaplin

_Pairing: _Thomas Barrow/Jimmy Kent

_Other characters: _Lord Grantham, Lady Grantham, Mary, Edith, Sybil, Tom Branson, Matthew Crawley, Mrs. Crawley, Violet, Mrs. Patmore, Ms. O'Brien, Mrs. Hughes, Mr. Carson, Daisy, Ivy, Alfred

_Genres:_ Angst, Romance, Drama

_Rating:_ M

_Summary:_ A young man comes along who's had a rough past. Thomas is given orders to keep an extra eye on him by the Lord himself. But Thomas is damaged too, and what no one knows is that what they need is not acceptable. Not in 1920, and Downton Abbey is no exception. But the sky is quickly changing, and everyone will feel it as the clouds roll in. A dangerous change casting its shadows over the abbey.

_Acknowledgements: _I do not own any of the characters, and all events are purely fictional. The story does not follow the series correctly at all times, and some circumstances are changed.

* * *

Stratocumulus - Part 1

_~ Stratocumulus clouds generally appear as a low, lumpy layer of clouds. Stratocumulus vary in colour from **dark** grey to **light **grey and may appear as rounded masses or rolls, with breaks of **clear **sky in between ~_

Christmas came and went. Branson and Mr Crawley were still making plans about the estate that his Lordship was coming to realize were necessary. The Bates trial was seeing light in the end of the month and Thomas knew Mrs Hughes knew something about Jimmy. Or something about Thomas and Jimmy. O'Brien had yet to make a dramatic scene and mostly hung around Alfred, petting his ego, or rather as Thomas saw it, his stupidity.

As from the new year Thomas had been made the regular valet of the Lord and Molesley tended to Mr Crawley. Branson still insisted upon dressing himself, but Thomas suspected they could hardly hire more staff at the moment due to the financially hard times for the abbey. Christmas had been hectic and the few times a week Thomas had had a moment to properly speak to Jimmy, he was making progress and becoming independent.

They hadn't had a reminisce of past events either, and Jimmy hadn't spoken a word of love or Latin or weather. It saddened Thomas more than it should that he was letting go of the comfort of Thomas, and that he didn't need to fill his mind with all kinds of non-sense in between his tasks.

Once, on Christmas Eve had Thomas come to his room to check on him. The drawing still stood and the curtains were set aside. Jimmy had smiled at him and bid him happy Christmas, before returning to his reading. Thomas was still looking out for him though, and he would have even if he hadn't been instructed to do so. And the information the Lord sat upon with silence still edged him, and pursued Thomas to make up a plan to get into the drawer in the library. The Lord's request for Thomas to be his valet seemed a casual change to most, as Thomas was indeed the most experienced after all. The Lord didn't ask Thomas any more, but Thomas could still sense a hint of worry, or pain, or both perhaps as he would hold the valet's eyes an extra moment whenever he came or when Thomas would ask him if that was all for the night.

A side of Thomas that had surprisingly subdued in the last months, knew that there were several potential ways he could gain something from sitting on the information he sat on, and for having the Lord at his feet in the case of Jimmy. Yet something disturbed him beyond his good mind to act upon it. He was almost afraid to admit it to himself, but it was definitely in regards to Jimmy and not the honour of his Lordship and the honour of Downton abbey.

It was now the end of January and it had snowed a total of two times since Jimmy had asked him about it, yet they'd been far too occupied to stroll outside those days. Thomas hadn't missed the longing looks Jimmy had sent towards the window, and he knew to ask him about it whenever the time allowed it. Thomas had finished his morning duties and stepped just outside the back door when he caught Jimmy walking past inside.

"James," he addressed him in a low voice, striking to aim casual as Mr Carson and the kitchen maids were still in the room. Jimmy was adored by most of the female staff, but it was clearly only politeness from his side. Poor Daisy and Ivy were blind to such matters though, as they'd always been. Especially Daisy, who Thomas has swirled around his little finger to get his wicked way many years ago.

That time seemed so distant now, yet so raw. Like Jimmy was walking Thomas' footsteps this time. But Thomas wanted better than that for Jimmy, for at heart Thomas knew, Jimmy was a better man, even if Jimmy had a hard time seeing that.

"Whatever is it?" Jimmy asked as he stepped outside, either oblivious to the cold or just not showing it.

"I think you ought to tell me that," Thomas said, trying to stay casual, voice neutral as he puffed smoke out into the thin air of the damp January. Jimmy closed the door soundlessly before leaning upon the opposite threshold of Thomas, arms around himself and palms resting on his upper arms.

"Why, I'm doing what I must. Moving forward, keep my mind occupied-"

"You're like a walking dead Jimmy. Stiff smiles and rigged movements. Pretending to be fine won't make you fine."

"Don't talk shit you know nothing about."

"I don't. I know. I know Jimmy."

"Shit, I want a smoke."

Thomas went to hand his end over but dropped it just as Jimmy was about to grab it, and stepped on it, meeting Jimmy's eyes with his brows raised. "Would fix it right now, for about twenty minutes, and then the haze breaks and you're no better from it."

"Don't see you taking your own advice."

Thomas gave him a look, pocketing his hands. "I didn't have anyone looking out for me when my struggles started. Said I'd be there for ya didn't I? Not just the first weeks or the first month."

Jimmy seemed to be struggling for words and Thomas observed the hesitant, bothered movements he made. Feet tripping, head turning and eyes blinking. Thomas acted on heart before mind and braced his arms around him, knowing Jimmy needed touch, and needing almost as bad himself, if he was honest. Jimmy resisted the touch for about two seconds before he leant into Thomas.

And slowly, as if giving Thomas time to retreat, he leant his chin up, nose brushing against Thomas' jawline, before he tucked his head to his shoulder.

And then, ever so lightly, ever so fast, but to Thomas it felt like the whole world stopped, Jimmy puffed breath against the thin skin on his neck, before his damp soft lips pecked his pulse point. For the first time in a long time Thomas felt hopeless. Maybe for all the right reasons this time.

* * *

It was the last weekend of January and the men were off to hunt for a couple of days further north. Mr Carson asked The Lord if he wanted any staff to accompany but apparently had been told that Isis would do for this time. As Mr Carson had revealed the news in the hallway he couldn't hold his tongue on the fact that Thomas was lucky the dog would join.

But it was much Mr Carson didn't know about these days, and one of those things was the fact that Thomas quite enjoyed the company of the four-legged white creature. And it was an excellent way to escape the closing walls and all too familiar rooms that made his daily surroundings. And then Jimmy would always join for the sake of fresh air too. Thomas didn't say anything though but sat back in his chair as Carson made it clear that the jobless valets would attend to other services as Carson seemed fit.

"Oh and James, the ladies said they were awfully bored these days staying so much inside. I said you probably wouldn't mind much to play something."

Jimmy's eyes shot up from his cup and straight to Thomas who only held a hint of a smile, before he averted his gaze to a waiting Carson. "If they wish."

"Good, very well. Alfred can mind the usual tasks on his own and Mr Barrow you can serve the wine tonight. I have something keeping me unusually occupied. Anna, if you could please come and see me at two."

Jimmy was still trying to catch Thomas' attention across the table but Thomas was eyeing Anna leaving to follow Mr Carson with that stone faced expression he so easily hid behind.

"It seems improper to me that a footman should entertain the women upstairs," Alfred spoke with his usual bluntness.

"Whatever improper is it about that you're hinting to Alfred?" Mrs Hughes shoot in from beside Thomas.

"Oh but there'll only be women in the room-"

"I suggest you stop talking about matters you clearly know nothing about. I will be present as well, and I expect you to show up with evening snacks if they should prefer it," Thomas spoke in an authoritative voice.

Jimmy wished Thomas would spare him a glance as well, but after staring down Alfred and letting his eyes sweep over O'Brien's for a second, he went back to eyeing the open door towards Carson's office. Silence fell over the room before O'Brien decided to restart the conversation. "Perhaps you should hear in with the ladies what they prefer you entertain them with," she spoke in her clear accent and a smug smile at Jimmy.

"For once Ms O'Brien here has a point," Thomas said as he made to lit a cigarette, taking longer than usual to get it fired. Jimmy stood, boring holes into Thomas and refusing to leave the room until the valet lifted his eyes to him. But when he'd stood there almost a full minute and Mrs Hughes raised her eyebrows at him and O'Brien snorted, embarrassment got the better of him and he took off in a hurry, taking time to let his footsteps sound heavy and disturbed.

As Jimmy came back downstairs he found Thomas and Alfred discussing the serving later, and boldly interrupted, even though he'd left the drawing room feeling smooth and collected. Maybe because Thomas hadn't not just looked at him but had taken O'Brien's side. Or maybe because Alfred deserved it. Or probably all of that combined, as well as the fact that Thomas had acted eccentric since their last encounter.

"They wish me to perform for them whatever I do best," Jimmy spoke right into the conversation going.

Thomas waved at Alfred, "Leave us. I expect you to manage as I explained." Alfred nodded vigorously, his tall frame making the action look staggered to Jimmy's notice, before the red head was on his way.

"Me intuentur," Jimmy seethed under his breath, but no one else were currently in the room. Thomas sighted, scribbling something in a book before closing it and turning to Jimmy. "You should play the violin," he said simply, leaning against the wall.

"You haven't heard me play that."

"Exactly."

"How would you know, maybe I play very poorly."

"I'll take my chances. And if you do I'll know, and it'd give the girls something to moan about for a couple of days."

Jimmy crossed his arms, afraid he'd do something inappropriate if not, like smacking Thomas or caress his face. Thomas was meeting his eyes now, but only barely. "What," Jimmy muttered, but defiantly all the same. "What is going on," he tried again but Thomas turned back to the counter and occupied himself with something.

"I've got a lot on my mind at present and I need to get back to my duties."

"They asked me to sing-"

"Tell them you can't sing."

"But-"

"Say you were joking, or that you in better judgement decided not to."

"Why."

Thomas didn't answer.

"Why should I. And why should I refuse if you don't give me reason to. Non aecuum est. It's not fair."

Thomas shook his head, leaning in to hiss at Jimmy, "No, non aecuum est."

And then Thomas took off leaving Jimmy to stomp the floor in frustration. As he went back upstairs after the dinner he figured he could just as well refuse to acknowledge Thomas' demands, or maybe even irritate the man in charge for the evening, but something had him hesitating. Not really because he thought Thomas would be very much upset, but he found himself unwilling to share something he'd only ever shared to Thomas at Downton. Somehow it had become special, something appreciated by Jimmy that was truly and honestly Jimmy.

He would feel rather uncomfortable actually, which was an entirely new feeling for him and not pleasant at all. He figured he could still do the piano as to not fully satisfy the raven haired, yet part of him also missed dearly having the sleek sharp strings against his fingertips and feeling the vibration of the music as he glided the bow.

And then he wanted to impress.

* * *

Thomas was impressed, but he was more than so really. The ladies were impressed and Alfred was , well, too stupid Thomas concluded to justify Jimmy's playing.

Thomas was mesmerized.

His heart was swelling in his chest and he had to leave the room for a minute to compose himself. It was in that lingering moment of Jimmy's intense look was plastered on him as he was the only one in the room, in the world, that Thomas saw. The effect Jimmy could have on him in a room where his mind was to be blank and his composure straight and serene was frightening. Somehow the ladies didn't seem to mind his absence too much and had sent Alfred for a snack and ordered Jimmy to play again.

Halfway through the violin sonata Thomas went to fetch more wine, but really it was more of an excuse to leave the room . As he came back upstairs he nearly walked straight into Jimmy entering the hall. "Hope it wasn't that awful that you couldn't bear it," he casually lay out as Thomas steadied himself in quick well-taught movements.

"I think the piano will do better for this late hour if they should wish you to stay on," Thomas said matter-of-fact before he steered for the door to the occupancy of the ladies.

"And so you accuse me of actions you mirror precisely Mr Barrow."

"No, I'm just trying to serve this rather fine wine to a spoiled party and not the pity floor, and restraining myself from my very urgent desire," he stopped himself, "no, unabashed need to dance with you, again."

Staring Jimmy straight in the eye he opened the door and let himself into the awaiting room, leaving Jimmy to come in after and closing the door.

"Alfred if you could bring down the empty glasses we'll be quite alright up here," Thomas instructed as he went to pour the ladies. "Perhaps you could play a walz James."

Jimmy played a tune on the piano and Lady Edith, Lady Mary and Lady Grantham went into a discussion of a new haircut, Lady Sybil hummed along and the Dowager was making her way down the glass.

"Lady Sybil may I propose a suggestion that you have a go at the piano? The servant's ball is coming up and I'd like to show James here how to dance a foxtrot."

"Oh of course I will. I'm a bit rusty, don't play nearly as well as James here but I'll give it a go surely," Lady Sybil enthusiastically replied.

Thomas thought her relieved to do something other than be bored of her sister's silly argument of last.

The old Lady Grantham sipped her wine again with scorning eyes at Jimmy. "Doesn't know the foxtrot? They give the young no proper education these days. And the entertainer of them all. Well I suppose better late than never."

"Then ladies, if you wouldn't mind awfully, I'd like to give James here a little lesson."

Lady Mary seemed to pop her head out of her scorning with Lady Edith long enough to give Thomas a reply. "Oh I reckon you better do so. I recall nothing of worse than a bad leader in a foxtrot. Stirs rather unpleasant memories of the ball up in north of the county a few years back. Never mind us the floor is all yours." A tight smile from the Dowager and an encouraging one from Lady Grantham and Thomas knew he was safe, and nodded to Lady Sybil who soon enough got the hang of a tune.

"Well, when you're quite there with the steps James I shall let you try with me. In return I ask for a few piano lessons if you could ever spare the time." Jimmy who had not known what to do with himself kindly smiled to Sybil before daring to meet Thomas' waiting gaze. It wasn't that he was hesitant to dance for he very well could dance. But Thomas was right he didn't know the foxtrot, at least not the leader part.

And so Thomas took Jimmy in his arms, as casually as one man could to another, to an audience of no minding what they could not know. And for a moment of such rareness Thomas did well to never forget it, and enjoyed the imagining dangerous thought of acceptance.

Afterwards Jimmy danced with Lady Sybil and got full approval of his moves before the Dowager hinted to the oddness of the evening and Thomas withdrew Jimmy and himself from the room.

"Yes we shall do good to head to bed now," Mary noted as Thomas bowed. "Very well then my ladies, I bid you good night."

Sybil addressed him back, "good night Mr Barrow. And thank you for the tunes James, they were terribly well."

Thomas smiled for indeed a good night it was and a good night it would be. Turning in the hall he spoke to a awaiting Jimmy. "When they leave to go upstairs fetch the last empty glasses and meet me in the library." Jimmy seemed to want to ask why the library and how Thomas had business being there but Thomas' defiant look had him remembering his brilliant steps and confident movements and he didn't trust his words to be coherent or appropriate.

* * *

Entering the library Jimmy was met with darkness, but before he had time to call out for Thomas the familiar voice spoke.

"Over here, by the window," Thomas said and Jimmy saw his shadow against the moonlight barely streaming through the heavy drawn curtains.

"Why do I feel we shouldn't be in here?" Jimmy asked as he approached the valet dressed as assisting butler for the evening. "Oh but we can. My recent deal with the Lord. And I lock all doors for the night so we didn't need to inform Mr Carson. He's not fond of such integrating bargains."

Jimmy squinted his eyes getting used to the darkness and saw what Thomas had hidden behind the floor length sun curtains as he drew one apart. "Candles...and beer"

"Yes, I know, I put it there," Thomas humoured a surprised Jimmy. They sat down by the large window and Thomas drew the curtains closed casting shadows of their forms which he found himself fascinated by.

"I wasn't trying to avoid you."

Thomas faced Jimmy now.

"I was avoiding you. As much as I could."

Thomas frowned and averted his gazed to the burning lights.

"And you know very much why," Jimmy spoke softer.

"Do I now?"

Jimmy leaned over and whispered as if someone would be in the dark quiet room. "Oscula tibi dare me delectat," he breathed in his right ear.

As he retreated Thomas grabbed his arm and held his stare. "Now it wouldn't be fair to say such marvellous words yet leaving me in the dark of their meaning."

Jimmy held Thomas' eyes with wavering emotion for a second before sighting and sitting back on his heels. Thomas was about to give up when Jimmy shoot forward and grabbed his neck and lay his cheek against Thomas' rougher and spoke to his left ear this time.

"I.."

pause.

"...want..."an even greater pause yet Thomas didn't dare interrupt.

"...to kiss you."

Slowly this time Jimmy slid his arms down Thomas' and came to rest on top of his hands.

"You were right, I did know," Thomas muttered, turning his palms to grip Jimmy's. Jimmy was in turn to frown and sought out Thomas' fallen gaze. "But Jimmy you mustn't forget you haven't known touch-"

"So is it not time? Do you not feel nothin' of the sorts? Would kissing me be so bad? Have I not shown discretion?" Jimmy was getting desperate, for Thomas to understand, to keep himself from throwing himself at the man before him. He could never though, not even drunk or drugged. He could never inflict any touch upon another being without their wordy consent.

Another invisible scar he would forever bear.

"Jimmy, Jimmy take your fingertips and feel my lips." Jimmy didn't proceed at once and Thomas lifted Jimmy's hand to his mouth. "Feel it."

Jimmy did.

"Feel how they tremble. Tremble to touch softer skin, to kiss unkissed lips."

Jimmy didn't remove his hand and Thomas took it in both of his and tenderly kissed the centre of his palm. "But I want you to be ready. Emotionally. I want to give you the benefit of a choice."

Jimmy drew his hand away, confused. "Choice? Do you not think I'm not certain of who I am?"

"Not at all. You may have been forced into the physical matter but you would never have formed feelings for someone. When I say choice I mean of whom and when. You'll never be obligated to be with me. I will never make you do anything or pressure you in any way. Just because..." Thomas shook his head and sucked his lips to regain calmness. "Just because I'm the only other you've met doesn't mean it has to be me-"

"Thomas-"

"No. Jimmy, when I said I care for you I really meant it. And you do not owe me anything for that. I'm not saying this is how you're thinking or feeling but I want you to know. I want you to know that you've got a choice, you'll always have a choice from now on. And never let anyone tell you otherwise. There are enough restrictions on us without our free will of mind and matter to be lost as well."

Thomas finally dared to properly look at Jimmy who was head down facing the floor they were sitting. For a moment Thomas' heart beat faster thinking he'd sold himself too much and sent Jimmy back in his corner.

But only for a moment, for then Jimmy was smiling. "Tell me when we'll see spring in the air. That is my choice."

Thomas smiled too for Jimmy's displayed happiness made him all crushingly swelling inside, making it impossible not to mirror it. "Then I shall not hesitate or stop myself. That'll be all on you."

Grabbing the two bottles of Irish beer Jimmy joggled them in the air and Thomas couldn't even feel nervous about them breaking and spilling the fine floor cause to heck to everything else but the young man sitting crossed-legged opposite him with new born light and life in his eyes like Thomas had ever seen.

"So Mr Carson won't notice the missing beer?"

"Oh he will, but he won't bother with it cause it's Irish. It'll be good riddance. No one drinks it anyway. Branson doesn't think it's Irish enough, for it's produced in England."

Jimmy laughed and Thomas had to join in for really, he was a chauffeur now married to the Earl's daughter, who would ever have thought. And here was he, with the prettiest and most honest loving man his world had ever seen and he wanted to kiss him.

He would kiss him.

As winter would turn to spring and everything would be lighter, and brighter.

Thomas would learn a little Latin and Jimmy, he would learn a bit of everything.

* * *

**Author's note**: Thank you all for all the lovely comments and feedback. I apologize for the wait for this chapter, but life is hectic and unexpected things happen. I hope you're still hanging in with me and the next chapter will see light much sooner, that's a promise. As always I appreciate all your thoughts so bring them on and leave me a review. Thank you for reading.


End file.
